I Have No Idea What To Do

since june of last year i've been trying, some would say desperately, to get my ex back to no avail. late january i decided it wasn't worth it and i gave up. i stopped calling, stopped texting, pretty much stopped going out of my way to talk to him. 

the reason i just gave up was because he was slipping into some pretty bad habits. living contently on nothing but unemployment checks, smoking weed all day everyday, and not doing anything at all with his life. i talked to him about it a few times and he made promises to stop but never followed through. 

around valentines day i met a new guy that i've been spending a considerable amount of time with. we get along amazingly and there's never a dull moment. like, i seriously like this guy. but not but a week ago, my ex calls me to inform me that he's turning his life around, trying to get a job and quitting weed for good because he's finally realized his life is going nowhere. and he also said something about not wanting to lose me because he's noticed that i haven't been talking to him as much. 

he pretty much asked me for a second chance, at which point i felt obligated to tell him about the new guy... and now it feels like i have a decision to make. i'm still in love with my ex but things didn't really work out when we were together. part of why i decided to drop him from my life is because i don't want to love him anymore and even staying just friends with him would cause all sorts of problems in my future relationships. but if i choose to get back with him, i just know it will mess things up with the new guy and i don't know that we'll be able to maintain a friendship.. i just.. i don't know what to do. 

tl;dr: dropped my ex from my life. found a new guy. ex decides he wants me back and in turn, turns my life upside down. help. 

i'm not asking for a decision.. only advice because i have no idea how to handle this

ayvri ayvri
18-21, F
2 Responses Mar 6, 2010

i think the right choice would be to choose the new guy. your ex had his chance and if he is a drug addict it possible if he succeeds in getting you back it is possible he might start back up again.

You should really stop looking in the rear view mirror while you are in the road of life. You are certain to have a big crash. Change is good. I would never waste my time with a drug addict.