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It's Hard To Find Friends

At my age, most people have a family. I don't have any kids and my husband is pretty much a goner. I have signed up for a few local meet-up groups and I have attended a couple of meetups. I found it was not really a good way to make friends, because most people attended with friends. I know I need friends, but how do I make friends?

depressed22 depressed22 46-50 4 Responses Mar 21, 2010

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I've never gotten the hang of actually making a friend, myself. As a student, when I was first being introduced to 'new people' in my flat, I'd make the effort to go to the initial introductory session at the bar, or in the dorm kitchen; but these efforts never once bore fruit. I've been on nights out with co-workers, I've been on excursions and so on and so forth, but the initial polite conversation never gives way to a genuine rapport. Instead, it is always acutely uncomfortable, and seems stilted and awkward. To be truthful, I haven't even managed to make friends on the internet, even having been on and around internet message boards for several years. I do currently have one friend from the internet, but that was really more a case of her being determined to have me as a friend and making all of the advances. All of my very few friendships so far in life have come from other people making the advances. Apart from one person who was always more of an 'associate' than a friend.

Hello,<br />
I can identify with everyone here. I even feel somewhat ashamed to even tell you all this, I don't know why. It is like I am in solitary confinement. I was raised by my grandparents who were a huge part of my life. Now they are very old 88 and 93. I have dedicated the last 17 years to raising my son and soon he will go his own way. I feel absolutely lost and stagnant. No one to call or turn to. I have just started a Meetup group. Hope that works out. Can someone die from being lonely?

Sent you an add.Please accept my firend request.I need friends,too.Love n Hugs

It's interesting, because I have only found friends in two places: high school and Alcoholics Anonymous. I got kicked out of high school for partying; and then got sent to AA, and in big cities AA is filled with all kinds of people. My aunt made interesting friends by taking Italian cooking classes, but other than that I'm mystitied. It's almost as if you can only make friends in places you're sent involuntarily...like AA, school, etc.