Life Decision

I have recently had this "issue", well I'm not sure if that's what you can call it, in my life. I'm not sure if it is just me, but I almost feel like I'm wasting my life. I feel like my entire life revolves around a chase for happiness, which is a reasonable objective however, it seems to bring more anxiety than anything else. I get these urges to change my life, to begin something new and to take chances. But I just don't have the guts to do it, I'm scared the outcome will leave me in a worse position. I guess it's the "not knowing" part that puts me off making these changes, the fear of losing everything and making a fool of myself. Then I wonder if I'm the only one that feels this way, if not, what would others do in my position. Would they take the risk and make the changes or would they hold tight and hope things get better. Do I just sit around, man up and continue to face my problems or do I try change things, try alternatives.

Let me explain. I'm 22 years old, I live with my parents and work as a commission only consultant. My Girlfriend who I love very dearly lives about 1600km (950 miles) from me, seeing each other during seasonal breaks and for the occasional weekend every month or so. We have been together for almost 2 years now and are very happy, we would love to move closer to each other, and work our way to marriage. Now obviously that can't happen while we still live so far apart, which is the first change one of us will need to make. We have discussed the issue multiple times and come to no conclusion every time, simply because I have a job here and she has a job there. Basically we both do not have the "guts", as I spoke about earlier, to make the necessary changes.

Which brings me to my life "Issue". Now although I have a job, I don't enjoy it very much and at this stage in my life it is not proving to be very lucrative, my boss is on my *** all day everyday supposedly trying to help, yet it seems as if he is just criticizing my every move. However, he may have the right to do so if I'm not performing how I should be I suppose. Either way, I am not happy. I have been in this position for 2 years now with the objective of using it as a way to learn about the business world, create a network of business people, learn business ethics, etc. Which in that regard, it has helped tremendously and I have learnt a lot. I am now getting to the point though when I would rather be happy and work my way towards a life with the girl I love.

This is where I am now. I don't know whether I should take the risk, make the move and begin a new life closer to my Girlfriend. Which would mean I would move out of home, creating a host of expenses and responsibilities, and having to find a decent job that I enjoy and allows me to grow and work to a point where I would be able to provide for a family. Or, should I stick out what I'm currently doing, work harder at it and make it my future career, even though I am currently unhappy. This would also mean having to wait for my Girlfriend to find an opportunity to move closer to me. I know she wants to and she is working towards it.

These decisions often leave me feeling very depressed as I just don't know what to do.
EddySA EddySA
22-25, M
1 Response Jan 9, 2013

You are unhappy with life now and it seems like this girl is the only thing that's. Going to complete you. Go be with her. Start a job there and I promise you will be okay. Its obvious you need the one you love and jobs are everywhere go be with her.