Taken From My Post In The Question And Answer Section.


What would you think of me if you saw me sp@nk my two year old after he ran away from me.?

 

He is a runner and I was thinking of counting to three and then giving him one, until he only needs to hear the count down. I'm just so afraid that he will run out of the bank or store and get hit by a car. It is very contraversial to do that. But it won't kill him and maybe he will stop running away, it's just so hard. I've also looked for those harnesses and there are none around my town. But as soon as I find one I'm getting it. But until then I was thinking of even doing it when he does run, which is all the time! I do have stories in a group I created called I need help raising and disciplening my children, I am in charge and can be very stern, I have 3 other children as well. Ugh tough crowd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can I say delete! But for those who understand thank you!

 






kessie






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 1:10PM

there is a difference between spanking a child and beating the child. I wouldn't think a person bad if spanking a child for being naughty, usually it is for the kids own good. Better a spanking than the kid running in front of a bus.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +5 You liked this!






butterflydreams






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 1:10PM

if you spank your child, I would think you were just disciplining him and that is fine. as for the harness idea and where to find one, maybe there are some sold online somewhere if they are not available in your town? I don't know where you live, but maybe they sell them on amazon or somewhere like that?


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +5 You liked this!






1softeffeteweakpr

ettysweettv






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 1:10PM

I would think: "Gee, I wish more parents would have the guts where-with-all to discipline their kids."


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +5 You liked this!






noshadow






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 1:10PM

It's much better to spank him now than try when he's a teenager. If you don't have control now.....worse down the road. It's not being bad, it's called good parenting. Something that the world is lacking these days.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +4Vote for this!  






realoce






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:52PM

Nobody teach us to be parents and nobody told us how hard it is. Every kid is different. People loves to judge others on their way of rasing kids, and I find this very unrespectful. They are your kids and you have to raise them accordingly to your rules, values and knowing that each one (nort even how many you have) and unique.



People always make opinion when they see someone spanking kids in public. But I know MANY go in "private" and spank, and pinch and yell to them, and that is ok for them.



A spank on time is the best. I was not a spanker to my kids....but a lot of truly commnnication was always there.



I ndesrtand you might feel guilty, is normal.....do not worry at all!


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +4 You liked this!






whowasthatmaskedm

an






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 1:11PM

Assuming your weren't really wailing on the kid and enjoying it, I would be supportive. Unfortunately, children aren't born with a better nature. It is taught by parents. And in the young, accracting their attention with a smack is a quick way of showing them what not to do.I enjoy reading those "its cruel" and "you'll warp them for life" comments. (Thats not true. I don't enjoy them at all. Those folks are going to end with the kids from hell. If the kid doesn't express its individuality by running into traffic.) I wonder how many will wind up with ulcers in there middle age because the kids never learned to pay attention to parents.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +4 You liked this!






zapbranagin9244






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 11:43AM

nothing, your doing the right thing in disciplining him is what i would think...


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +4 You liked this!






porsher






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:53PM

My Sister always used to say to me"you don't have to spank a child in order for them to listen,it's the tone in your voice" but each to their own!


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






clayantony






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:53PM

if you dont put kids right when they are young,how will they ever learn.i would not think bad of you if i saw you spank your child,..especially after he ran away from you,anything could've happened to him,you were rightly upset.i took plenty of "spanks" when iwas a nipper,all of them deserved.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






bubbys111






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:53PM

its normal


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






kaytiej






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:54PM

I just stumbled onto this and I have a similar problem. My son likes to run away too. I am having a lot of issues with him and picking him up from daycare, he likes to run down the block while I am putting my 2yo in the car. I have considered spanking him but always get scared of "what would they think?" Reading through these comments helped my situation now, I see that if not many people think it is wrong then I should really just spank him if he does that again. I feel a lack of control with him and maybe the spanking thing will help.



As for the OP -- I would think "maybe I should try that" lol


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






Nemagun17






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:54PM

I would say good for you! Kids used to be spanked all the time, it's just that now, even if they truly deserve it, you get services called on you. It's ridiculous. You're not abusing the kid, you're showing him the consequences of doing something bad.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






essendon






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 11:58AM

Tie his shoelaces together.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3Vote for this!  






sexysienna






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 11:44AM

essendon ... your hilarious..



look.. i have a kid who is 16 now.. he was a runner and a biter.. i never liked to spank and since i was so young when i had him it was a trip to me.. but once i started showing him that its not him who runs the show and that i am the parent and he is to mind .. it took a minute and with some consistency he learned. its for his own good and i know the norm now is not to spank.. but in some cases your either leash him to you like a dog, strap him in a stroller every where you go or spank and grab his hand and tell him no... and that running is not acceptable..


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






Literaturegirl






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 4:41AM

I would think you're motivated by concern and fear and that it's understandable, but hope you could find a more effective way as it doesn't seem to be working! It's not always easy and/or straigtforward to be a parent I think...


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






aaad






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:56PM

bringing up a CHILD WITHOUT DISCIPLINE IS NOT GOOD FOR THE CHILDS UPBRINGING . YOU SPANK THE CHILD TO GET CONTROL . IT IS COMMON SENSE . WELL DONE IS BETTER THAN WELL SAID . I MYSELF HAD A STRICT MUM THAT SPANKED MY BARE BOTTOM IF I DID WRONG . IT DID ME NO LASTING HARM . I AM THANKFULL TO MY MUM FOR KEEPING ME IN LINE . I LOVED HER LOTS . I FELT LOVED WHEN I WAS OVER MY MUM.S KNEES BEING SPANKED . SHE CARED ENOUGH TO MAKE ME A BETTER PERSON . YOUNGSTERS TODAY HAVE NO DISCIPLINE . THE CHILD WILL THANK YOU FOR BEING STRICT AND KEEPING HIM OR HER OUT OF REAL TROUBLE . WHEN OLDER PREVENTING THEM FROM BEING IN TROUBLE WITH LIFE CHANGING EFFECTS . A DISCIPLINED CHILD IS A HAPPY ONE . YOU CAN NOT BUY COMMON SENSE . PARENTS SHOULD TAKE CONTROL IN THE HOME .


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






PapAdder






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 11:44AM

Double post, see my answer on the first one...


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






fuglywuggly






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:56PM

pretty typical occurance. Its not as uncommon as you think. A swat on the behind will get your point across. My sister only spanked her kids when they were doing something dangerous that could hurt someone else or themselves, ie, running away, throwing things, playing with the stove. When they did something wrong, that's when they got the time out. When it comes to harming themselves or others, kids need to learn, not only is it wrong, but there is a definite reprecussion.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






blackarcher






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:57PM

As long as you weren't doing it in anger or using excessive force, I would think you were being a responsible parent. Every parent has to figure out what works for their kids. I rarely spanked my kids, but I did when I felt it was the only way. Generally, though I always tried spanking in favor of more creative methods of discipline.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!






goahead






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:57PM

I would think now there is a parent that loves and knows that they are the parent and at times a spanking is in order


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +3 You liked this!








   21-26 of 26 Answers   


prev 12next »




 






sunnisouthernbell

e






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:59PM

better to been a spanker mom than be sitting by his little casket..and a situation i let happen could have resulted in just that..i let my son beg out of being in his carseat...and it was a disaster..both of us might have been killed...or worse, just him..and how do you live with that?



spank his little bottom. just know limits. and absolutely yes to the harness. if i could i'd send you mine..yes, i still have it. and if i could still get it on my son at 15 i would!!! i've threatened him with a doggy shock collar! [joke, of course!] but this is not from 'no spankings'...just hormonal 15 yr old vs menopausal ole mama!



good luck, sweetie..and feel free to pm me anytime.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +2 You liked this!






Cuddlytoy






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 3:59PM

I'd think, well done. A short, sharp shock will make him think about listening to you in future. Always tell them why they got spanked (even if they think they know.) You can lose a child in seconds when they're out with you and it's scary for you if they run.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +2 You liked this!






Leo21






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 11:47AM

Well I've seen it all the time happening in public, and I don't think anything negative about it if it's a spanking. The parents are disciplining their child. My mom used to use a large wooden spoon we used to call the stick and beat my brother and I. We knew not to be bad after that and yeah we cried for a bit but at the same time we knew that she didn't want to hurt us.



When you do it in excess is when it becomes a problem (e.x. punching them with a closed fist, kicking them, throwing them against a wall, beating them til they're black and blue all over their body from bruises, until they're bleeding etc.)..


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +2Vote for this!  






krystelle148






Posted Feb 27th, 2010 at 4:56AM

He's so young, spanking is not going to get throught to him. In the old days abuse was okay because everyone feared their parents but today children see how other children get treated and recent their parents, rebel more and get more disapline. it can ruin the relationship. Also your child is 2 years old, he does not know what he's doing is wrong and will not know why he's being punished, all he will know is that he gets spanked for a certain behaviour, does not know why and thinks you are mean. Because your child is so young and such a runner, I know its horrible but you should get a child leash. Get down to his level and if he can understand, explain to him he needs to wear it because he runs away and he could get hurt. Don't blame yourself for spanking your young child tho because it is a common natural responce, parenting is the hardest job in the world.


[Delete]Flag





Rated: +1Vote for this!  




SealedWithAKisss SealedWithAKisss
36-40, F
3 Responses Feb 27, 2010

you can monitor your kids whenever by HelloSpy

I totally agree, spanking is not to be used in every circumstance unless the child is putting themselves or someone else in harms way a spanking would be far less painful then getting hit by a car! I do use the time out method 1 minute for each number of age unless they don't obey the time out it starts all over until they have thought about what they have done and ways that they could have done it better, and I do all that I do because I do love my children so much, I do know that they love me and are kindof grasping the concept of consequences. It takes everything to me, most of my time and energy, communication, training, practice, constant reminders, lots of love and compassion. I do have times when I don't know what to do, but it's always good to talk to a variety of people to get some insight and to see the effects it's all had on other people. Thank you for your comment.

Spanking does have the ability to get through if you look at truly unbiased studies. However it must be done without anger and it is best to keep something that you KNOW won't injure like a fly swater. Using the hands however is NOT good as it gets associated with violent behavior and fighting.<br />
I would support you in a heart beat if done for the correct reason in the correct manor. Spamking begins to loos it's ability once they start to get above 10 yrs old hover according to the studies I've read and wrote on when I was counciling. <br />
Another thing is to set aside a couple days for time out battles. VERY FEW have honestly done time out correctly. Many say I've tried that and it don't work. Normaly it is not true. To truly have it work sometimes you need to have a day or two where you will keep picking the child up and puting them back even if it takes hours on end before they give up! You have to break them in a sense. (This is for those shall we say extra spirited children). But they will keep testing you. You have to say NOTHING. Just keep puting them back untill they stay regardless of how tired or angry you get inside. It can be hard. I've succeded at it with many children that parrents said it would not work on.<br />
However I still see spanking as an option on things that a child shows life threatning behavoir on. Just as long as it is NOT with the hands on the body. Hand to hand like a child reaching for medicine or a stove is okay.