I Need Answers

First off, I am a 26 year old healthy young man. I keep myself in great physical condition and exercise 5 to 6 days a week. I eat healthy foods and not junk foods, and I keep my weight where it is supposed to be. I am single, but I have a girlfriend that I have been seeing for 3 years with a few breaks in the past. I have no children whatsoever. During the breaks between my girlfriend and I, I did some living. I started living a social life and having fun in every way possible. I never did anything illegal or got arrested, I just had fun. I drank socially and if I had too much I would find a ride. I never drove intoxicated or anything that would jeopardize my future. I say all that to say this. I began working as a State Trooper in a state i won't discuss when I was 19 years old. I just quit my job in October without having another job. I sat down and figured my income and the money that I would receive for my paid leave. I concluded that I would have enough money to last me for 2 months until I found another job. After leaving, I called my friend and started working for a tree topping service. I have helped him some through the week just to keep my mind busy. Since it is around the holidays, work has slowed down and he does not have any work for me to do. So now all I have been doing lately is cleaning around the house, applying for jobs, and washing clothes. It is nothing at all compared to what I was doing as a State Trooper. I was constantly stressed and about to enter deep depression when I worked there. I realized that I did not want to live the life that they wanted me to live, so I made a decision. I consulted with the Lord and turned to church, and still do to this day. I have brought my faith up to par and I am thankful for that. I am having a lot of stress related issues, and I have been restless and even grinding my teeth in my sleep. I got disciplined for getting intoxicated and finding a buddy to give me a ride home. The State Patrol told me I was not to go to certain bars off duty, and that I was not to call a ride if I got too drunk. After they found out I got a ride home drunk the second time (word travels fast in a small town), they cut my pay $5,000.00 and transferred me 240 mile round trip from home. My girlfriend had to take care of my house and my dog since I was still paying for it and still am. There were a lot of things that happened even after I got transferred, and I kept a daily journal of it. I have thought about seeing a lawyer about it, but it is going to cost a lot of money and headache fighting something that large. But now I am left without a job (with plenty of money), and nobody is hiring during the holidays. I sometimes feel like everyone is just out to push everyone else in the world around, and whenever you push back or do something brash it is "unacceptable". I honestly just wish the Lord would come back and take me to where I need to go. Nobody feels sorry for you, and nobody cares about your problems. Much because they have so many problems of their own they have no time to listen. I hate whining to people about things, so I just keep to myself. Sometimes this causes problems in my relationship. I try not to take it out on my girlfriend, but when she bothers me about it I just can't help it. Everything just seemed so much better as a child. It seemed like everything was so much easier. I find myself looking at people in regular street clothes now and thinking "wonder what they do for a living". Yet I have spent my whole life in a uniform being bullied around and told what I can and can't do on and off duty. Along with working every weekend, holidays, nights. I would work anywhere from 15 to 26 days straight without a single day off, swing shifts. Sometimes I would be working 3 different 8 hour shifts in a 48 hour period (3-11pm, 8-4 am & 11pm same day to-7am). And now I am just trying to put my life together and have a normal life and schedule. It just seems like the world is filled with bullies. I get so tired of having difficult bosses that I would just rather mow yards and work for myself. That way nobody is looking over my shoulder. Someone please give me some insight. Thanks for anything.
dbc115 dbc115
26-30
1 Response Dec 13, 2012

It's hard to give definitive advice. What else could you do besides answer to the man? I'm 54 and still working at the whim of a cruel corporation. Find a way to make a satisfactory living that doesn't drive you crazy. I'm thinking I will work for a charitable organization where I'll want to do my best rather than be bullied into perfection. Some people have multiple jobs and deal OK with that. Ski patrol in the winter, plumber in the summer. I wish there were easy answers. You are going to have to keep going forward and exploring actively, until answers provide themselves. From your efforts and also your intentions. Your sincere intention to do what's best for yourself even if it means lower pay, can make opportunities appear. Can you find an apprenticeship? How about an internship? I did what my parents told me to do 30 years ago. I'm well-off now but didn't enjoy these 30 years of work. Just the weekends and evenings.