She Lost Me ... Years Ago

My mom. She lost me. I loved her more than anything at a time, but then she lost, me, andjust like a lost child , I need help, and not help finding my mom, but help staying away from her.

Shes been emotionally and verbally abusive since I was 5. Every now and then she goes overboard on the physical diciplin and I'm really starting to get sick ofit . Ive came to the point where I only have a couple of ways to resolve it. Ive "stayed strong " for a long time and so has my older brother ( who i deeply and truly fear might be on the verge of suicide :'( ]

A. Runaway ( idk where to go or how to explain if they ever find me etc )
*B. Live w my dad ( w his achoholic gf who REALLY doesnt like me )
C. Waituntill high schoolto move in w my grandma ( we usedto b really close but because i have my own problemsits hard to love her the way i used to and plus even though its amazong there, its miserable in its own ways )
D. Suicide, im religous , but ifi succeed in it ... itll just have to be
E. Hang in there and eventually develop a mental illness ( ive had friends whose abusive parents made them a little off in the head, its not about avoiding that its just, i dont know how to live w that and misery and this and that and etc etc )
LonelyWaterLily LonelyWaterLily
13-15, F
Dec 3, 2012