Somebody Help Me.. I Need Some Guidance..

First off, I am a young adult (25 y.o.), unemployed, and I have quite a conservative family. I have tried a lot of times to come to a decision about my problem that I really think should be resolved at the soonest possible time. The issue is I am pregnant and am currently thinking of having an abortion. :(

There are a lots of things to consider and I know it is unfair for the embryo ( 3-4 weeks approximately) for me to think of such act. It's just that I grew up being a 'goody two-shoes' person, always doing what's right, being an example to my younger relatives, always being trusted with responsibilities, doing great with my studies -- making me feel that I need to abort the baby to live up to these 'expectations'. I know that this makes me an evil person and I have been going back-and-forth between saying yes or no to the pregnancy.

Here are the pros of my situation: having a new addition to our family since a parent of mine died less than a year ago, I will be able to stay here in my hometown since I am supposed to leave the country for an opportunity abroad, I am on the right age for starting a family, my boyfriend is totally up for having the baby, and of course having a baby would be a great gift to me.

Now for the cons: people will be disappointed of me, my family may reprimand me for being stupid, the opportunity abroad would have to be cancelled, I would have to deal with the consequences of my actions, expectations may change, negative reactions may be received, and I am not sure if me and my boyfriend can afford to have the baby as his salary, I think, will not be enough for him to support me and his family both at the same time.

Additional worries if I do proceed with the abortion includes future conception problems, emotional turmoil, and living with regrets for the rest of my life.

I am just sharing my story just to know if someone may be able to shed some light into the situation and help me realize as to what is best for the same. I want to hear some feedback from a stranger's point of view as I would not like to be judged by those who know me beforehand. Help me please. It feels like I'm dying here. :(
pitycrown pitycrown
22-25, F
Dec 7, 2012