So Love Starved, I'm Not Sure If I'll Ever Love Again...

I feel like I've given so much over the years. I don't know if I can give any more. I havn't found anyone whom I 'instantly' fell in love with, or was physically attracted to in a long time. I just want to keel over and die some days since it would make no difference. My family is practically dead to me, so they aren't a concern. My friends will live, they will have long fantastic lives - perhaps the maximum damage my passing would cause is a few therapy sessions. Probably the hardest hit would be my dad. 

Thats just it - I feel like I've done nothing with my life so far, and although I try my hardest I don't feel loved or needed enough to continue. 

I think about Romance so much, I think about how much of a stronger man I would be with a loving girl by my side, someone whose dreams I could help make come true while they supported me with my own. This seems like fantasy, even though I'm told that it is possible - I can't find it. 


I'm so alone I feel like a corpse. 

Maul Maul
18-21, M
3 Responses Mar 7, 2009

the grass seems greener on the other side, not always true but so it seems so that's what we see and why we suffer hehehe :) Yes my friend what you're saying is something I'd say myself, a loving caring partner is the most wonderful gift a human being could have, nothing compares to it. That's my opinion BTW. I think I'm independent emotionally; I don't need any human being to live, but then again what is life without love both to give and to get. Sometimes I miss the point of life without it. I'm also a helpless dreamer... What I'd say to you though my friend is if you haven't done anything with your life so far, start right this minute because you've got to live in the meantime...

snap....:) i feel the same...see my life isnt has great things in it ..but no matter what, i want someone to laugh with, to share all the beautiful simple moments with, its security, people with the right kinda love are always ..just happier... my life is always gonna have a big empty hole until i find someone to fill it, but you cant be anyone,...its got to be the right fit. so looking is pointless, but waiting is so heartwrenching...he better hurry up and come, and she should hurry up and find you too...and when you find someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, you will wake up everyday..exited for the rest of your life to happen ...:) until then, we have to hope, and try and become, better ,truer, honest, loving, kinder, lauging people, so we are preparing to be the best lovers we can be!

go and see a doctor about how you you smoke weed this may be why you are feeling this way,as this is what it can do to you.