I Don't Know What To..

Okay so my Dad has never been a "stable farther figure" to me. Even when I was younger. I have never known me and my mom together because they split up just after I was born. I lived with my mom and saw my dad every weekend. But when I was 8 me and my mom moved over an hour away so as you can imagine seeing him every weekend would have been hard; so we changed it to ever two weeks. When I was in year 6 going through my SATs he left. I tried calling him, texting him, asking around after him, everything. I got nothing. Then one day I got a card from him saying he is sorry. So eventually after about 8 months we were back in touch and I was going to stay with him again. But then in year 7 he did the same thing again. But for even longer. So I did the same thing once again, ringing and texting after him and I got the same result every time. So once again it was left to my Mom to pick up the pieces. Then, same as last time he got back in touch and we were talking again. But then he started promising me things and then breaking his promises. Then Christmas eve 2009 I just got so angry at him for breaking all these promises so I rang him. But that lead to nothing but an argument. So being me, I slammed the phone down in anger; thinking he'd call back the next day to wish me Happy Christmas and to see what I got. But no, I got nothing. Days, weeks, months passed and still no contact. Was this my fault? Then summer 2010 I got a card from him for my birthday with £200 inside! And a number to call him. I didn't call him until the September and that was when we sorted things out. Although it wasn't until the 22nd December 2010 that I saw him again. And ever since then he has been there and then not been there and its just like going round in circles. However, this year I moved back to where I used to live and for a while I went to his girlfriends shop where he worked and I did a couple of shift everyday until my school was sorted out. And now I have been in back in school for almost a month and he hasn't asked about it once, he hasn't called me in over a month? I don't know what to do anymore, it's as if I'm fed up of giving him chances just to be let down over and over again! Thinking about it now when he gave me the money for my birthday was he trying to bribe me with money for his forgiveness? Am I stupid for giving him this many chances? It's not as if he doesn't know where I live, why can't he come and visit!? I don't know what to do. Please help?
2417hdac 2417hdac
18-21
Nov 27, 2012