*sigh*

I just want another guy to spoon with. I am a celibate gay christian... Spooning makes me feel so secure, and safe, and loved... I just wish I could find someone I consider decently attractive to be with that has the same celibate intentions...
jennings2012 jennings2012
18-21, M
3 Responses Dec 6, 2012

I was out the other night and met a cool guy, I sent him a text when I got home and he invited me to his place. We talked and had some wine. Light kissing and cuddled all night. I love it. I wish I had that every night. just nice to hold someone tight.

Do you think that you can spoon with a younger guy?

If he was masculine and if I was attracted to him sure! Haha!

I'm a lifegaurd, so in tan and muscular

Well then unless you have for some odd reason an extremely repulsive personality, which its obvious you don't, then hypothetically I wouldn't see a problem spooning with anyone who is at least 17-18 years old. I would want to know the person at least a little though because I would want to make sure that both of us actually have the same intentions and that the other person (not saying you, just in general) wouldn't try and get me turned on and try and have... "relations" with me haha! ;)

Yay, i totally get it, cuz it would be kinda weird if you just started to spoon with a random guy, who ends up trying to have "relations" with you, if you know what i mean

Haha! Exactly!

2 More Responses

wow.....my feelings exactly, friend but I am older so probably I am not an attraction for you..But I just wanted to thank you for expressing that..It is exactly how I feel..I am a celibate Christian but had male love growing up..No real father and the step father did not want me..total rejection..I just need to hold and be held..Just to hug and be hugged..Just to have that feeling from another male..I understand perfectly where you are coming from..God Bless you and may you find that perfect friend...
mike

Exact same here. I think you may have read it somewhere else in one of my stories before, but my father was present but not emotionally (and not intentionally, his own father died when he was 13 and my dad is the main provider of the family and worked 10-12 hour shifts my whole life. I have no resentment towards him because I know he loves me and he did the best he could because he was just trying to provide a good life for us). My older stepbrother was very jealous of me because his father wasn't present at all so I was rejected and resented by him my whole life. One grandpa was dead before I was born. One was an alcoholic, but now 40 years sober, and felt guilty so never came around but maybe once every 10 years since I was 8. My mom's foster father was a drug addict and shot himself in the head on accident and cut us off from him after his rehab. So I literaly have NO male role models in my life. And once I was older (teen years), I kind of just shut myself off to role models and just lived my life for Christ and went at it alone. And about that same time is when I realized I suffered from Same-Sex-Attraction

Wow...We both suffered with no male role model and it definitely leaves scars..I mistyped in my earlier message..I meant to say no male for me at home. And I was influenced my a mother, a grandmother and 2 aunts as far as church attendance in my earlier life..I was saved at 12 and have always been active in church. But as I told you it was such a struggle to deal with SGA feelings all those years..It is a miracle that I wound up married with 3 children but it has been a good life for me..I do miss SGA relationships a lot..I had some in my teens and early 20's. Fond memories for me...I need male love so bad and I just never did fit into a man's world unfortuately..I think my mother wanted me to be her daughter.She hated men..Fortunately thought I am not effiminate..and I am glad of that. My only father is God my heavenly father..and He has never let me down..Sure I have always questioned why He allowed me to be gay but through lots of therapy I have finally accepted it because i have prayed numerous time for Him to take it away but He never has for some reason. So, there must be some purpose in it and maybe the celibacy effort has resulted in blessings from God..I think maybe so.. Anyway thanks for writing me and please tell me your correct age..Is it as noted in the 18-21 range.It doesnt matter and this may be silly but since I am much older and I am a successful parent it appears, maybe you need me to say some things to you from an older guy's perspective..If I can be any help to you, please let me know..I am willing to talk about anything absolutely..
Regards.
mike