How Can I Be This.depressed?

Ive been married fifteen years. Employed thirtyone years with only five jobs. I was a senior exec. I have three smart beautiful children. However my wife is totally unable to give herself to true intimacy. She has .just been caught planning sex witha classmate te half her age. Shes having a mid life crisis and concerned with waging. Looking f.or her first career. She even decided she needed a break after this semester and took off to visit her sister at the beach and missed mothers day with us. Now I'm really depressed because I didn't kick her out when she begged for another chance and we have a family of school age kids to consider. I am codependently in love with her still. I want to be free of my addi took to her but I want her to stay and save our family and be my spouse. I cant bear t9 raise the kids myself. I have no family support here. I may be losing my job betweeen the economy and myquality of work since this allow happened. It seems that thoughts of ending it are only tempered by my faith. I'm in constant prayer now Anne feel alone. Ive given up too much to please and haven't taken care of myself. I Need someone to talk to and I am embarrassed by my situation and wont confide in my friends.
hurt1too hurt1too
51-55, M
May 13, 2012