I Feel Alone From Everything That Recently Happend

I don't know where to really begin. The unexpected happened in my house last night. I got so mad I destroyed precious things that where in our home. I don't know what came over me. My wife and I had a argument and it went to a level where it shouldn't had. Her mother got involve before things went crazy. I just threw things. It was so hard to control my anger. there was no one there to calm me down. Ive been married for 6years and her mom still doesn't like me. at least that's what i feel. We moved and she still manage to get the apartment above us. I thought it would be OK cause they are close to each other. but i was wrong. I love my wife so much but i really hurt her with things i said. There were 3 women yelling and cursing at me and my wife who should had kept it between us basically let her niece and her mom get involve. When her mom came down stairs and opened the door the first thing that came out her mouth is, " you see he is a piece of **** like the rest of them" . so much for trying to handle the situation when i started going off on her mom and telling her how i fell after bottling it up inside for six years. my wife turned on me and tried to cover my mouth. she was talking to me like someone from the street. it was my house and i had no saying. It hurt me so much to sit there and take all the bullshit. To see my wife talk to me the way she did. I don't know what happened I was fine. I had a good day At work. I came home to edit the pics i took at the Superbowl party. She and her mom or her niece had gotten into an argument. because they were already fighting when i got home. I told her lets go to walmart and we went. I was trying to make her feel better. Instead i was annoying her. and i was a little upset cause i had good intention. but then the past was  brought up and she yelled and then i yelled louder. and from there i didn't stop. people where yelling back at me. I feel so hurt and stupid for braking the monitor and ps3. I wish i have an escape and i feel there is any. i wish i had someone to talk to because my family is 133 miles away from where i am, but they would care for how sensitive i fell right neither.I still feel angry, and very sad, alone and betrayed. her mom drives me crazy. why do i have to deal with her everyday. why do i have to deal with the after affects she causes to wife when they fight.They yell scream and curse at each other more than me and my wife fight, but when i got mad and yelled, I'm pure evil. I have so much anger inside and i want it to go away. I wanna cry so much and i cant. I wish I had a mom to cry on. It so hard to sut here at work trying to sell cars with a positive attitude and trying not to cry. Everyone can see and tell something is wrong. mainly beuase im quiet today. Im usally the one who mostly all the conversation in the show room going. no i just miserable and cant sell a car to save my life. I want to know the best way to calm down when i feel im about to explode  
CnJ4eva CnJ4eva
22-25, M
3 Responses Feb 16, 2011

I dont think you need people, alcohol, RX drugs, or any of that. I think what you need is something outside of work & family 2 do for fun such as a sport, club, newspaper article, journal, etc. Try to at least take maybe an extra 10 mins in the shower to take a few deep breaths & enjoy the silence before facing the world again. All that anger inside of you can be toxic, and if prevoked in such ways as you were, most would explode too. Family is a hard thing...I always want to yell at mine but at the end of the day, its just breath wasted. Anger fuels frustration which in turn fuels more anger & hurtful words that you cant EVER get back. So before blowing up, try to take a few deep breaths, think of how you felt last time you exploded & how many people (including you) that you hurt, & remind yourself that Anger can sometimes be a huge onset of testosterone too. Its not always your fault. Have more Sex, seriously,....its good for those in love & marriage...Hope this helps. Forgive yourself & dont carry that guilt around..xo

It's tough to have relatives involved, and generally the wrong thing to do. To control your anger, I'd suggest (as jessawessa does) that you walk away and cool off for a bit. It would probably help to have some sort of hobby or something to focus on--even if it's origami or something silly! <br />
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Perhaps meditation of some sort would help...a long walk...writing things down. I do wish you the best and hope you take the high road.

Hi, I just read everything you wrote and wow. I get like that too and I'm a girl, I've thrown and broke phones, blowdryers, and even put my fist into a picture fr<x>ame..so trust me when I say I know where your coming from. I have learned that sometimes you need to walk away before you get to that level, lock yourself in your room and blast the tv or radio. If they follow or bang on the door then get in your car and drive to a friends house, or back to wal mart or somewhere. It sucks cuz everyone is ganging up on you but it sounds like your wife is taking her anger with her mother out on you, which isn't fair. She needs to stop with that because clearly, its not fair to you, but like I said just walk away, take a few breaths or go for a drive but don't stick around because its only ever gonna get worse..I'm sorry your going though this, message me if you'd like to talk in the future