My Life Is Snowballing

About my life situation: I have been planning on moving back to New York to pursue my own life again. I've completely recovered from my car accident and I'm ready to be back on my own two feet. I'm not one to complain, or be miserable but my current situations prevent all of that from happening.

1. Recently my mother fell, and in-turn, she tore her rotator cuff completely; I have to practically be a hand-maiden on top of everything I already do -- which is pretty much everything.

2. I was supposed to live with my cousin for a couple of months in New Jersey while I looked for a place in New York, but since he and his fiancee are separating, it seems practically impossible - this is something I was not supposed to know about, but people talk. He was supposed to help in my segue back to my independence and the city I love the most.

3. I've been saving a lot of money and last week, my dog fell almost fatally ill. My pets have always been like children to me, and this is the first one to ever be sick. He has a severe arterial fracture that has no guarantees of being fixed, so I may have to get him euthanised for his own good, and that really pains me.

4. All of these stressors are an add-on to my already hectic life: I take 8 classes a week and work a full-time job.

Writing this out has already helped me but I would also like to be able to vent to someone I don't know. 

 

Thank You

OskarMonoir OskarMonoir
22-25, M
5 Responses Mar 27, 2008

I too am in a complex situation. I do not like to move and do not like to travel. I like to stay in place so to speak. However............That being said I used to live in the city. I was happy there. That really is who I am. I fell upon hard times as far as finding a job and I ( who also thought my animals were my children) lost everything ( including my animals. Also the first relationship in my life that showed ANY promise. That was six years ago maybe a little more. <br />
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To make a long story short I ended up pregnant with a a child from a guy that was and is SEVERELY Mentally ill. I ended up looking to my parents for support. This brought me back to my hometown which I never felt like I belonged to. It has the HIGHEST unemployment rate in the state and has had so consistently, and the people there are just not at all like they were in the city, which believe it or not was that ( city people) knew what it meant to be a true friend. <br />
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I am stuck up here now, my parents are attached to my son who is perfectly healthy and normal and I am not even sure that taking him out of this situation would be good for him. He goes to private scchool and has the best of everything. I am miserable here and now i am not even sure that I will be able to find a job as college did not work out for me at all. I do not know what to do but it sure would be nice to have some real friends. <br />
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The irony of my situation is I feel that the reason that my college didn't work out was because I was around a bunch of women who were absolute ******* to me. If I contributed, they said " I wanted to be in control." If I went along with whatever they said i was told "I wasnt a team pla<x>yer." This situation went on continuously until I now am flunking/dropping out. Thus explaining why I now need to look for a job where there arent any. I feel the same as you do. Venting to strangers feels good.

i know what you feel like and times like these really make us wondering what life is all about. just remember that in an average 60-70 year life span, these moments are not fetal and we all eventually pull through.

yea im hoping for the best for ya too, vent away!

vent away my friend, i'm rooting for you:) i want you to live the life you dream of in our favorite city!

I just read this and would love to let you vent, I seem to be good at that according to my friends... but am a little shy about just messaging you. Just remember when things are hard, that one day you'll look back and know that those experiences taught you to appreciate the calm of life. I'm sorry to hear you can't get back to New York. I've only been there once...