I Don't Know Who My Friends Are Anymore...

My best friend joined a sorority and now she refuses to talk to me because I'm not apart of the greek life. The other odds and ends friends I've had over the years have forgotten about me, ignored me, blew me off, or attempted suicide. I've only dated one guy, in high school, for three years. I gave him my whole world and would have married him given the chance. And now the only person I ever really trusted calls me a ***** and uses me. I've managed some casual encounters with guys, but none of them can come out to be anything serious. 

I have no friends, I'm alone. My parents are divorcing, I'm working three jobs to make ends meet in a household I don't want to live in anymore. I can't talk to my family, I have nowhere to turn.

I need a friend. I need a stable relationship with someone who isn't going to turn around and hurt me again. I need someone to hold me at night and tell me everything is going to be OK. Someone warm and caring and supportive. I don't ask for much, and I'm far more mature than anyone my age. Because of this, I feel like no one understands me. I need someone just as mature as I am who is my age, which seems so freaking impossible. I'm hopeless, honestly. I don't think I'll ever find love again; two years is a long time to be single. 

I'm not promiscuous, but somehow I'm constantly labeled as such. I'm smart. I'm hard working. Why can't people see that? What am I doing wrong? The advice I get is always to go out and party, get drunk, then you'll meet people. But that isn't me, and frankly, that isn't the type of people I want to meet. How can I manage to make myself happy again? I'm so lonely and lost. I want to be strong, but it's so hard.
rednailpolish92 rednailpolish92
2 Responses May 13, 2012

Aww. You poor thing. I feel that way so many rimes, but you just will have to live :/

Ill talk to you