A Loveless Marriage

I am in a marriage where there is no longer any love. My husband's heart is made of stone. I try to talk things over with him and he responds as though I am forcing him to do something against his will. Whenever I suggest we separate he gets angry and says that I am threatening him. he treats me really badly.He goes out with others for the entire weekend, coming home in the wee hours of the morning to get a few hours sleep, only to get up and go again the next day. If I call a name of one of his friends he gets really over the top angry and tells me not to speak about him. There are days when he would swear that he wants to save this marriage and he wants to do what it takes but he makes absolutely no effort. Every time I try to approach the topic of our marriage it ends in an argument. He never shows me any warmth, or caring or love. I don't know what to do anymore. he goes about his daily activities like he has no care in the world and I am panicking that this marriage is about to end. I suggested that we see a marriage councilor but he outright refuses. I am really going crazy about this because there is absolutely no love, no intimacy. nothing between us. He completely ignores me for days on end. He often says to me and to everyone else that I treat him really good and he couldn't ask for a better wife. Yet he treats me like this. I don't know what to do.
yunikorn23 yunikorn23
4 Responses May 24, 2012

Im not married but I have been with the same guy for 7 years and he treats me the same way. I get called named he sometimes even hits me wen we fight. To make matters worse we have a 6 month old baby girl and he threatens me with her every time we fight. I try talking to him and he just blows up or takes some thin I say the wrong way and we fight even more. I no how u feel I feel the same way pretty much every day. If u need some one to talk to Im here!!!!

Please go to a book store/family christian book store and buy Five Love Languages By: Gary Chapman and Love and Respect By: Emerson Eggrich

You have given the caption rightly, you have analysed rightly, but you want to save the marriage. It is one sided marriage, the love flows from to him, he is a good receiver and receives it and you are a good care taker, which he appreciates well and gives due credit. So, it is a happy and healthy marriage as far as your hubby is concerned. If you are going to be happy with that, this marriage will be saved. He is not ready to leave you, it is not because he loves you, but because you take care of him well and no one will do like you. And the over night stay and abstinence from you for sex shows that his needs are satisfied elsewhere. So, all his needs on all the angles are taken care well. And there is nothing for you in this marriage and we cannot make him to understand. So....? It is upto you to deciding. Saving this marriage is good for him, and is it good for you?

I had some of the same issues. All I can say is be smart. Don't wait for him to talk, change, try, or care. If he is sick or addicted. Try to help. If not stand up for you! Lay out situation and do something. Fix or walk(run). Good luck. We all deserve happiness.