I Just Dont Know....

For the past few months I have been feeling extremely depressed, and my wife for two and a half years doesn't take me seriously.....over a year a go now we almost broke up, i moved back into my parents house and have been here ever since and we have been seeing each other and saying we are on and off..... the only reason we got back together or wait... the reason why we splilt off was cause of a guy she ended up getting involved with. we ended things and went our seperate ways and once I started doing fine again in my life and seeing someone she came back told that girl i was seeing off and sorta made me be with her...i was confused and wanted my wife... i still do, I'll still want to be with her....but shes so into her friends and live and not taking me serious... i feel so alone and this past two weeks we haven't been right at all we stopped talking and she has even started to flirt or talk in that manner with other fellows and expects me to be all ok and still want her when she makes it seem like i have competition..... i'm really lonely i have no friends i stopped talking to everyone because of my wife.....ever since she left me in vegas money less and rideless and i got back with her they stopped talking to me.....I'm at the brink of loosing it not having someone to tell everything to or speak out to..... and on top of that.... ive been wanting to talk to that girl that I stopped talking to..... i know its crazy of me....or of her to even speak to me after i clearly chose my wife over her more then once..... I've hurt her already and I seem to care a lot about that.... on the other hand, my wife seems to be the reason for my depression and lonesomeness.... I'd like to get some advice or something before I jump on the gun on my actions.... I just want to be happy again and do whats going to just make me feel the way I was before my problems started..... If i could have my wife with no bull and drama that'd be great....but we've tried that and it made things worst didn't fix things and just is making us just detest each other..... in the other hand if my wife would just not try to control me and my life and i tried to re established something with the other girl...that just makes me feel like i'd be happier.... I know i'm worth it and i'm not worth feeling this a lone and depressed all the time knowing that the one that's supposed to be my partner and bestfriend is out having fun ignoring what is going on with me.... i know i can make my partner feel loved all the time I might be a pain from time to time, like any other men is but through out all my relationships i can say I know i can be a really great guy in a relationship, and I just happened to always choose the wrong girls....... I always think about the little things....and i think that matters when all day everyday little things remind you of that someone and that something makes you react and do something to let that person know... hey even though you weren't there, I thought of ya....... my wife and I don't have that any more.... at least I don't think so.... but I don't know... I don't know what to do.... This is like my last resort, I'm tired of coming home from work to a lonely room no one to talk to nothing to do.....its just depressing..... please help me out
Dguywithproblems Dguywithproblems
22-25
Sep 11, 2012