This Is It.

i've been in a relationships for three years now im 21 and my boyfriend is 27, we love eachother alot and do anything and everything for one another. i guess alot of people would think what else could you ask for? well in the positions me and i boyfriend have dealt with we have to be there for one another. our whole life together so far to this point has been nothing but trouble and heartache. we've lost everything several times and had to rebuild what we once had. ive been outted by so many people that it has left us broke and on the verge to losing everything again. we have bad luck in meeting people because everyone we have let into our lives has found one way or another on how to screw us. im in colloections for several different things because i wanted to help people and boy friend has lost alot of goodfriends because he wanted to help people. no matter how good we try to do something or how hard we try to get our lives pulled together and set straight theres always something pulling us down
i start getting really depressed and insecure because of this too, i feel that since i have nothing and no one to talk to accept my boyfriend that i push him away and we distence from eachother, he spends alot of time down at his daughters house and we barely sleep together. im just scared i guess that since ive lost everything hes the next thing to go and i dont want that to happen because i know we can work through this but sometimes i just feel its gone to far and he would be better off just letting me go. i really hate my life and sometimes i really wish i wasnt alive. i jsut want things to get even a little bit easier, i wanna be able to go back to school to better myself and i want him to go back to school to better himself. i guess all i really want is to have a home a real home that is ours. with no landlord. i want to be able to pay my bills and not have disconnection notices every month or collections bills everytime i cant pay something. i just want a simple life. i just want to be happy.
and i know theres a ton more problems out there in the world and that im the least of anyones worries.. but i wish someone anyone would help.

i just want some help.
briimariee briimariee
Sep 23, 2012