Am I Overreacting?

This is my story, If there is anyone who would take a minute to read and give me advice, I would be very thankful....Here goes nothing...A few weeks ago, me and my girlfriend broke up because of me being stupid. I know it was my fault for overreacting over every little thing and i accept that responsibility. After we broke up, i decided to put my life back in order so nothing like this would happen again. Recently we decided to try being together again and it was going really well, but theres a problem. While she was not with me, she was talking to another ex, and she told me herself that she was trying to see how they worked together. I had assumed that it didnt work out because she came back to me. I understand that she was not with me at the time and she could be with who she wanted to. I even asked her if she want to try things out with him before she come back to me and she said no she didn't. What happened next is what made me very uneasy. when we were in bed together(completely naked and doing what people do)...he called her phone, and she actually stopped us so she could answer him(i was okay with that because he's still her friend and he's in the military so she doesnt get to talk to him often)...they were talking and i could hear everything she said...she didnt tell him who she was with..she said she had to go....and heres the big one, she said the exact words "I love you too"...i assume he said i love you first...afterwards when i asked her about it, she said it was nothing, but it doesnt like thats something you say to someone who's just a friend....i also asked her did he know we were back together(apparently not)..i cant help but think that the only reason shes with me is because hes away in the military...Since i used to have problem with overrreacting, i dont trust my own can someone....anyone please give me advice on how i should react....i dont want to ruin this relationship again for no reason....and thank you for reading my story, even if you decide not to comment
GabeAlexander GabeAlexander
18-21, M
4 Responses Dec 3, 2012

Why did she have to hide that you're with him? She's cheating right in front of you. I think you're right that she's just with you because the guy is in military.

I don't realy know anything about you two or anything like that, so I can only tell you from my experiences. I think she could possibly just be testing you seeing how much you'll deal with to stay with her. But she also could be straight out cheating on you. I mean hear this out: First you two break up, Then she and you both try to move on (her and her ex), Next you get back together but she stopping (you time) to chat with him she says I love you too him then when confronted won't tell you anything. I would try to at length talk about this with her. If you still don't work it out maybe it's not you it's her.

I have been in a similar situation in a relationship, which is why I am trying to help you, because I "think" I have a fairly good idea of what is really going on under the surface. The girl you are "in love with" is most likely extremely fond of you but she is trying to find out for sure whether she has a future in the other relationship because if she doesn't she wants to be with you. The operative thing for you to understand, and act upon, is that her commitment to you is very much dependent upon whether or not she feels she has a "real" relationship with the other man. What you have to decide is whether or not you are comfortable with the fact that your relationship with her is dependent on whether or not she thinks her relationship with the other man is going to "pan" out the way she wants. If she really only wanted you she would not be waiting for anything. I hope that you understand what I am saying so that you can avoid being hurt any more than you are already hurting or think you will hurt upon choosing life with out her. The decision is yours and yours alone. I wish you good luck with your decision.

You need to save yourself and find someone who is with you for you and as she is not for whatever the reason and it is not your fault. S**t happens and stupid s**t happens even more but you don't need to be part of it. Put yourself first.

I know what you mean and if it was anyone else i would leave them on the spot, but i love and trust this this girl more than anything because she has earned that...but i dont think she realizes how this looks to me or how it would look to anyone else