Ldr

Well, let's start off with a few months ago. I met this woman online, and we would talk all the time whenever she could. She was in a marriage and it was failing. She changed so much and always made people come first, to make sure they were happy and had what they wanted. She was suffering. But I, made a difference in her life and brought her happiness. Anyways, she goes to her sisters for a week to see if things work out when she gets back but he kept ******* her off, not giving her time to herself. She stayed out there and left him, with there 3 children. It's been a month since that and she's been hurting a lot because she misses her children, but not him. When she first got out her, she was all lovely and dovey to me, we even fall asleep on the phone together.
Will lately, she has been acting differently towards me and I asked her, she isn't "in" love with me but I am, but she loves. Before our status was lovers, but like I said, she's hurting a lot, got out of a marriage, completely changed her life, and she said needs a friend right now. I honestly understand that. Now we made plans that we would meet up in June, we live 1600+ miles away and I'll be going down there if **** doesn't hit the fan. Now I'm wondering if she will ever fall in love with me and I know you can't rush love. We talk everyday on the phone and I'm always the one to say that 'I miss you' or 'I love you'. This morning we talked for 5 minutes before she got ready for work and I didn't say 'I love you'....she didn't say it at all. Now I've got a few questions. We are best friends at the moment and I'm wondering if we will become bf/gf again(if we ever were). Now she is a goddess to me and so incredibly beautiful and I worry if she will ever date anyone or have sex with anyone since we're not 'lovers'. She said that many guys have asked her for her number or even for a date( I can't remember) and she said no.
Another thing that bugs me and I'm probably just being paranoid but her sister adopted someone when they were 16. Her step brother and her are going through the same problems, they live with their sister now, always see each other, always talk, and even always talk fb and twitter. Now me thinking that they're step family, that they're having sex together. That stuff does happen.
And another thing I'm wondering is if I'm wasting my time or not with her. LDR are very stressful because they require a LOT of trust. I'm only 19, she's 22 and my life is just beginning but for the longest, I wanted to be with someone who I love and they love me back. I'm sick of being alone.
I know I tend to over think things. Does it really matter that she doesn't say 'I love you' every time we get off the phone? or even saying goodnight via text? I love her with all my heart but I would be wasting my time if we're just going to be best friends for ever. I can wait but I can not wait for along time. And I know being jealous is sign of caring for that person, but any tips for me not to be jealous?
Note, I asked her if she wants to be with me the other day, she said yes and no. The reason for no is because I check out what she's does on social meida sites, made a twitter because she has one. I know it's one of my flaws and I HATE it about me. But she did say yes about wanting to be with me.
BigSmexy BigSmexy
18-21
2 Responses Dec 12, 2012

We agreed we should be friends. She knows she needs professional help and that could take some time. We have a gift for each other but didn't ship it yet. But I think we shouldn't because I wanted to be with her, not her friend but that just won't happen. I told her I would never leave her but it would just be awkward for me. I haven't told her yet that we should just move on and not be friends because I'm afraid of causing her pain.

live is to shot .....move on