I Need Someone to Talk to
Do you ever feel that you just need someone to talk to? Someone that doesn't know you or cares about what the outcome of that conversation is, who is not going to judge you or your story, and someone who is there just for you, to listen and maybe provide a couple words of encouragement. I don't have anything to complain about, nor do I really need advice as my logical side tells me it's just a matter of time, while my illogical side just keeps asking how much longer - I just want to share my story, and my problems with someone.
I moved to the states almost a decade ago for my undergraduate studies - did well in college, got a good job afterwards, paid off my student loans in a couple years (~100,000) and recently moved to a new job where I got a large salary bump. Even after all this, I feel a sense of failure in life - I'm not very happy with my job and really want to be an entrepreneur but my visa wouldn't allow it, I've been in a long-distance relationship with a really great girl for four years, making monthly trips across the country to see her, my family has a massive debt back home (>200,000) that I can't begin to imagine how we will repay and even after all our efforts, my family's lifestyle back home can only be classified as lower middle-class at best. I can't remember the feeling of not being in debt.
My ideal life would be where I earn enough to pay the bills, and a little more, don't have debt, living close to family and married to my girl, and have the ability to take a little risk and start my own company. I wish, I just wish one of these scenarios came true. It's been four years since I graduated from college, earning close to 100,000 a year and I still have only 1000 in savings, with no other assets to rely on. My family debt is like a large weight that I have to carry with me and my confidence is shaky from doing it for so long. I know I can get through it, but I just feel fatigued and tired mentally from stressing about it. I wish I could pop the question to my girlfriend, but until I'm financially stable, I don't feel right doing it. I can't allow for her to go through the same kind of stress that I'm dealing with on a day-to-day basis. Worst of all, I can't talk to anyone about my problems openly - I don't want my girlfriend to get the impression that I cannot take care of her and myself going forward, and I can't let my family feel like I'm losing hope. I can't talk to my friends because this is all too personal for me to share. That's why I'm looking for someone anonymous, who doesn't know of my existence aside from my story.
Thanks for reading. I really appreciate your time.
I moved to the states almost a decade ago for my undergraduate studies - did well in college, got a good job afterwards, paid off my student loans in a couple years (~100,000) and recently moved to a new job where I got a large salary bump. Even after all this, I feel a sense of failure in life - I'm not very happy with my job and really want to be an entrepreneur but my visa wouldn't allow it, I've been in a long-distance relationship with a really great girl for four years, making monthly trips across the country to see her, my family has a massive debt back home (>200,000) that I can't begin to imagine how we will repay and even after all our efforts, my family's lifestyle back home can only be classified as lower middle-class at best. I can't remember the feeling of not being in debt.
My ideal life would be where I earn enough to pay the bills, and a little more, don't have debt, living close to family and married to my girl, and have the ability to take a little risk and start my own company. I wish, I just wish one of these scenarios came true. It's been four years since I graduated from college, earning close to 100,000 a year and I still have only 1000 in savings, with no other assets to rely on. My family debt is like a large weight that I have to carry with me and my confidence is shaky from doing it for so long. I know I can get through it, but I just feel fatigued and tired mentally from stressing about it. I wish I could pop the question to my girlfriend, but until I'm financially stable, I don't feel right doing it. I can't allow for her to go through the same kind of stress that I'm dealing with on a day-to-day basis. Worst of all, I can't talk to anyone about my problems openly - I don't want my girlfriend to get the impression that I cannot take care of her and myself going forward, and I can't let my family feel like I'm losing hope. I can't talk to my friends because this is all too personal for me to share. That's why I'm looking for someone anonymous, who doesn't know of my existence aside from my story.
Thanks for reading. I really appreciate your time.
By:
An EP User
