I just can't break from this darkness. I'm always miserable and angry at something and I dont know how to just stop and feel good again to know what happiness is again. I guess I should give my reasoning for feeling this way. Not that I've ever really been a happy person. In 2009 my dad died, it was hard but me and my mom we just about pulled through that was until my mom died in 2011 they were both 46. I had just turned 18 when I lost my mom. Ever since I've been sinking deeper and deeper into this depression and I don't see a way out. I'm 20 now I managed to get a job and a girlfriend. Those are both another story, neither make me happy but I guess at this point if I deserved happiness I would have it by now. I must deserve this. I just wish I could end it all, I don't have anything to wake up in a morning for. Nothing, that's me nothing, no-one.