I Need Someone to Talk to
I´m a 24-years-old spanish girl. I few days back I wrote a post in which I offer my friendship to everyone who need it. Now I think about it I could sound too fake. But actually I did that because I know how life can make your world fall apart.
I was born with a deformity in my oesophagus, my heart had four malformations (this is known as Tetralogy of Fallot) and my kidney didn't work. I had four surgeries before I was six, and doctorswere able to fix my heart and my oesophagus, and they also remove my kidney. Since I was a kid I've been going to see my doctors at least 4 times a year. It wasn´t actually that bad for me, it was worse for my parents, obviously.
But when I was 13, after moving away from my school, my friends and all that I knew, I decided that there weren´t enough problems in my life. I don't remember how I started worrying so much about my body. Anyway, I started throwing up everything I ate. I lost like 66 lbs in three months. This lasted about seven months, until the school counselor found out about what I was going through and tol my parents. I was so mad at everyone: that woman who didn´t mind her own bussiness, my parents who started to follow me around, and at myself, to let people take notice about what I was doing. Since that moment I started gaining weigth until now. This part of my life isn´t over yet, but I keep fighting it everyday. It would be really easy to came back to those days, but I can´t do it..
Also, during the last 4 years my family and I have been fighting this stupid crisis that is hitting almost everybody. We can lose our house and everything we own, and we have to pay back a lot of loans that our siblings have lend us, and this go on.
This is my life right now and Though It is just a thought sometimes I think that the easy way would be ending my life (my father even told me that he had thought about it as a way for us to collect the money from the insurence).
There are bigger problems that a person can have. But right now this what I have to face everyday, with or without help. I have to say that is easy with help, more of it the better. This is why I wrote my last post, offering help who anyone who need it!
Thanks for reading, and I´m here if someone want to talk, or be my friend in EP!! ;)
I was born with a deformity in my oesophagus, my heart had four malformations (this is known as Tetralogy of Fallot) and my kidney didn't work. I had four surgeries before I was six, and doctorswere able to fix my heart and my oesophagus, and they also remove my kidney. Since I was a kid I've been going to see my doctors at least 4 times a year. It wasn´t actually that bad for me, it was worse for my parents, obviously.
But when I was 13, after moving away from my school, my friends and all that I knew, I decided that there weren´t enough problems in my life. I don't remember how I started worrying so much about my body. Anyway, I started throwing up everything I ate. I lost like 66 lbs in three months. This lasted about seven months, until the school counselor found out about what I was going through and tol my parents. I was so mad at everyone: that woman who didn´t mind her own bussiness, my parents who started to follow me around, and at myself, to let people take notice about what I was doing. Since that moment I started gaining weigth until now. This part of my life isn´t over yet, but I keep fighting it everyday. It would be really easy to came back to those days, but I can´t do it..
Also, during the last 4 years my family and I have been fighting this stupid crisis that is hitting almost everybody. We can lose our house and everything we own, and we have to pay back a lot of loans that our siblings have lend us, and this go on.
This is my life right now and Though It is just a thought sometimes I think that the easy way would be ending my life (my father even told me that he had thought about it as a way for us to collect the money from the insurence).
There are bigger problems that a person can have. But right now this what I have to face everyday, with or without help. I have to say that is easy with help, more of it the better. This is why I wrote my last post, offering help who anyone who need it!
Thanks for reading, and I´m here if someone want to talk, or be my friend in EP!! ;)
By:
yeja88
Age:
22-25
,
Female
9
responses
