Confused, Upset, Very Low!!

I have been with my partner for 14 years.  We have been engaged 8 of those and stayed together 7 years. I have been very unhappy for a while now!  I don't think I love him anymore!  I don't want to have sex with him and when I do I am so upset after it!


I started a new job about a year ago and have met a hole load of new people.  However as it is in a hospital most of them are men, I am quite a chatty person and enjoying talking to people!!  One guy I get on with in particular is 6 years younger than me, but we get on really well, we can talk about anything!  We text each other on a regular basis.  We were talking the other night after work and both admitted we would like to sleep with each other - and I really want this to happen!  He just wants some fun and I want a little something extra in my life - but not my partner.  


I am soooooooooo low just now.  I am sitting here in tears just now! 


Help me!

31-35, F
2 Responses Mar 3, 2010

IDK, it dosen't sound like you guys have married yet. I would say, to end it now. There are 5 things I think extremely important in a relationship. <br />
1. God I beleive there should be a spiritual base that binds you two,<br />
2. Sex I beleive it is important to have a real initmacy in your relationship<br />
3. Trust I beleived there must be trust between the two of you.<br />
4. Money always try for balance in this area. Never feel like you are giving more than you are getting<br />
5. Friends I beleive people are important in our lives. We need friends that are couples and we need individual friends.<br />
These things are important in a sustaining a good relationship, if any are comprismised there will be no happiness. So dry your eyes baby girl, and never regret anything that makes you feel good.<br />
<br />
Note of caution: Please recognize your purpose for having sex. Explore this thoroughly so that you don't get it confused with love.<br />
<br />
Hit be up, you are my new friend. I need you too.

Maybe you are unhappy because you have found a new source of men who are giving you attention. My only suggestion is not to sleep with anyone until you have divorced your husband. Starting an affair or even a fling isn't going to make you any happier, in fact, it may ruin your life. Try giving your husband another chance. But you can't do that if you are thinking of cheating on him. You didn't say anything about your relationship but you are going to have problems in your marriage. It's the way you handle them that makes the difference. If you love your husband, try to work it out. I've been happily married for 21 years. That doesn't mean it was all a picnic. You've got to at least try to communicate with each other. Otherwise, I think you've made your decision, just be careful how you make your bed. You may have to lie in it.