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Help...

I need help..I cant seem to stop liveing in my head..Its becoming a really big problem. See I put my self in this preposterously lewd and immature scenarios where  I am vaguely impressing someone of the opposite.  This little daydream are over comeing me and takeing my  real life away. I am 17 so i know that me being interested in the opposite sex is normal but as i said thing are getting out of control. Every time a girl looks at me i think she is interested in me so i take that and run with it in my head, and  this happens 3 to 4 times a day where a good looking girl  would just glances at me and i would become lost in her beauty...and anytime a guy looks at me i imagin my self beating him up and after a bit of time i develop a deep hatred for him but this is for good reason i live in something of a bad area so i allways have to be on guard or if not face the repercussion...alot of savages live in my area and sometimes that ignorances can have an influences on me. I do live a secluded life, i have no friends, i have an extremely small and  isolated family (but i do get along with them) and i can and have gone days without talkeing to or seeing another person but this is of my own dowing.  Some people have tryed to befriend me but i refuse because i know they are irrelevant...i did not allways think like this i at one point was a considered to be a popular person. I  started thinking like this a few years a go to improve myself sins then i have lost 50 pounds my grades in school have dramatically inproved i have become more calm i just flat out got better. But the dreams..the fantasys they are killing me..i realy need help...badly...i cant sleep at night i cant think i have become socially awkward i am losing my mind!..i cant do anything any more....for the love of god please some one help tell me what i am dowing wrong..and dont give me that bull that i need to befriend people or something because if thats what your thinking i dont wana hear it  I wana know what i can do on my own.......ON MY OWN!!!              

Zipcode017 Zipcode017 16-17, M 2 Responses Mar 6, 2010

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I can relate to a lot of what you're saying here. I don't make friends easily nor do I really want them. I prefer my own company particularly since many of my interests are difficult to share with others.



Having said that, however, there can be a lot of risk associated with being introverted particularly if you're prone to depression AND have a tendency to work out your tensions in fantasies that have mixed messages. It can be invigorating and positive to imagine that a young, attractive woman is interested in you; it's not so positive to imagine yourself ripping into a guy whom you might see as potential competition.



You really do need to get out of your head a little and commune with the real world. This doesn't mean you need to go completely against your own inclinations by attending parties, going to clubs, etc. Introversion seems to be an inherited trait and there's no reason to force yourself to be more socially active if that isn't natural to you. However, there are plenty of activites you can enjoy on your own -- the main thing is to avoid activities that give you too much of an opportunity to get lost in your own head.



You need some freedom from these fantasies until you can really understand them. Fantasies, like dreams, contain powerful messages for us but these messages are encrypted and as such, they are not easily translated. Your fantasies are trying to tell you something about your feelings about sex, power, tension, fear, and aggression, Some professional guidance (psychiatrist, psychologist, etc.) might be able to provide you with some of the answers you need about why you are having these obsessive thoughts and how you can interpret/control them.



You are NOT doing anything wrong; you're just in need of additional information about who you are and what you want. I hope you'll write back and let us know how you're doing in this area. You do not need to suffer; you just need to understand more about what's in that head of yours.

My young man, u have to grow up mentally, more over, ur approaching adult age and needs to mix up with other. U need it because u have alot to learn. If the behaviour of people in ur locality is not ok, make a move and look 4 people that reason the way u want, u need to make good friends now. Again for young girls to admire u, there is nothing bad about that, its natural. U only need to be careful with them because u cant avoid them for ever. Think 2wise.