I Am Being Abused And Cannot Find A Way Out
I am living with abuse by a person who I live with. He owns the house. First he was kind, considerate he asked me to watch his place and told me to move all of my belonings in to his place and get rid of my storage and he kept saying 'its a big place, please use it'
he lived away working on construction and would send me checks to watch to place and 'be there' be around when he got home
we began seeing each other, if that is what you call it, but nothing like anything I have ever been through before. Insisting on me spending holidays with his family then disappearing and not calling for months.
Then, he came back because he lost his job and the abuse and bizarre behavior began, although there were signs of it when I visited him in Cape Cod last year. He aske dme to come up and wanted to show me off to his friends. It was horrible. He slept and smoked all day then wanted to go out at night. He would say there was no money to go out so I thought we were going to go grocery shopping and he got angry at me saying 'where do you think you are, this is not home you know' I did not understand and was quiet. We went to a restaurant and he said he had no money so I ordered water and he got angry and yelled about that. I asked what he was ordering and he got angry and said 'dont order what I order'
The waiter put a glass of water on the table in front of me and he got angry AFTER the waiter left saying 'can i move this glass' and before I could answer he began to have conversations with himself which went like this 'oh, ok, i see you dont want me to move it, fine, this was a mistake'
we have had many 'this was a mistake' episodes upon going out and it is strange and bizarre as though he is speaking to a child or scolding someone and it does not affect me that way because I cannot relate to anything he is saying.
he demands me to sleep with him sometimes other times he LOCKS ME OUT OF THE BEDROOM?
no reason are given just the same rendition of 'i cant know anything you live a secret life' which is bizarre he knows everywher ei work and go and stalks me at my jobs goes through my belongings commenting on what I take out of the house (my clothing shoes) and screaming at me for being ten mins late to work (how does he know? i dont know)
yet he goes out drinking and to parties and if I ask where or if he will be late he begins the rendition of 'i cant know anything you live a secret life'
i went to a therapist who I no longer can go to since insurance changed with the company i work at part time, and she said sounds like he is doing all that he is actually blaming you that you are doing so strange
like i see myself and how honest and what I do I hear when I tell him my schedule I know he follows me and knows all i do
yet i HEAR HIM SAY HE KNOWS NOTHING AS he goes out about his business telling me nothing i am not allowed to see the camera he went out and paid lots of money for yet he talks about it and shows to all friends and family in front of me and keeps it in his car
he has porography and naked women on his computer from classmates.com yet will not acknolwedge me on his facebook? yet i am to spend holidays cooking and cleaning and paying for his dinners and family?
this is all bizarre and i am begging God for mercy on me I have no money to move out and have been searching for a safe room to rent on a week to week basis
he will be back from cape cod soon i am experiencing nightmares about the things he has physically and emotionally put me through they have been horrible he molests me daily
it is horrible
he tells me to GET OUT NOW if i dont cooperate and begins to scream about things that do not exist (my secret life my not telling him things)