Growing Up Isnt Easy
So today was our 6th wedding anniversary. He got sick yesterday after work. Maybe heat exhaustion...he works in the sun...and hes fat as heck! lol no really 290 and a bit over 6 feet tall. Anyways....no card, no present and no sex for years! I get lectured by a friend of his on how to compromise in a relationship. Fo rlike 30 minutes this guy talks to me about how couples giv up to easy on their marriages. Hes been divorced twice! Anyways so I am telling him nicely that I have put plenty of effort into my amrriage with his buddy. Hes telling me a man needs his woman to support him yadayadyyadadada and ona dn on. I loose it and yelled at him finally. I had to make ammends fo rit too. All signs point to divorce but I am going to move out for ahile first so he doesnt go ballistic on me. I am so over it. I used to get sad and angry over things like being hung up on on our anniversary and no card or present. Im not angry today. I just realize that he doesnt love me like I had hoped he would. He never will. He may be incapable but I hop enot fo rhis sake. I remember what being in love feels like....it was with my husband.....it was always painful with him though....maybe i didnt ever relaly love HIM. I loved the idea of an alternate him. A better him that would have loved me because the alternate him has a functioning brain. Seriously. if you knew me you would be perplexed as my plight. Why on earth have I let things go on this long? My daughter...that's why at this point. Before then??? who knows....probably because I was supposed to be paired up with my daughter. Go dknew we needed each other. I'm on my way to being me again and I am excited. I gues I can quit this group now because I have decided not to staty in my marriage. I like jsut using EP as a diary that talks back to me. My sexless marriage story has the details of my relationship.