so much to do

I need a way to escape... I don't like people looking at me like they want to eat me..

" PsSorfff you soul suckers you know nothing of my misery" I bleed like the rest of you...who are you to try to come near my inner sanctum which is me.

I was in a 9yr relationship where my ex was happy to hide me away in a house 

I really didn't mind or (so I was led to believe ) but I didn't want to go out. I didn't want to do anything but draw & be a good mum... but what i did was forget who I was & what I was and what was going on in the outside world...

My only outing was to the supermarket.

I could not & cant do that to my children especially when they may not even have that choice later in life.

there is so much to do...so so much

So much to see ....

 

caroli9 caroli9
41-45, F
1 Response Jan 28, 2007

Asyou said (I DONT BLONG IN THIS BODY)YOU HAVE GREAT TESTAMONY; HY AGAIN; SEEMS LIKE YOU HAVE GONE THU MANY EXPERIENCES IN LIFE;WITH UPS AND DOWNS; AS YOU MENTIONED YOU HAVE THU 9 YEARS OF RELATION AND AND CARING MUM FOR YOUR KIDS; AND I GUESS YOU BELIEVED TRADITIONAL RESPONSIBLITIES OF A WOMAN IN FAMILY;; AND SEEMS IT DID NOT WENT WELL; ;OR WHAT EVER; I SHARE YOUR HOW YOU FEEL ; YOU WILL SURE FIND EASIER SIDE OF LIFE AS TIME HEALS TO OVERCOME;; AND YOU WILL HAVE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE;;BUT AS I PROBABLY TOLD WE AS INDISUALS WE ARE SIMILAR TO HALF A WHEEL; AND TO CONTINUE WE NEED TO NEED MR R RIGHT(IF FORTUNATE)TO FIND OTHER PART OF OUR MISSING WHEEL THAT FITS, SO THAT OUR GOING GETS EASY ; AND WE NEED BLESSING AND AND BIT OF GOOD LUCK; AT A EARLIER AGE WHEN WE ARE YOUNG. TENDER AND CARELESS WITH SENSITIVITY IT IS EASY TO FIND CHOICES OF FRIENDS OR PEOPLE TO CHAIR US UP; BUT WITH THE TIME AND EXPERIENCES ,WE LOOSE THIS SENSITIVITY; AND NOT REALISING WE HAVE CHANGED;AND HARDENED UP AND TOO CAREFULL IN PERSUEING OUR DREAM WHEEL; BUT IN REALITY OUR GOALS AND DREAMS ARE THERE LIKE BEFORE; IN PERSUE OF HAPPINESS;I WISH I WOULD HAVE REMAINED INNOCENT TO WORK DREAMS AS I DID YOUNGER AGE WITHOUT TO MUCH WORRY AND WITHOUT TOO MUCH CAREFULNESS; BUT THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE JUST LIKE US WHO COULD BE GREAT GUIDS IN LIFE AND EQUALLY HE OR SHE COULD GUIDE AS OUR SOULMATE WHO NEEDS US AS WE NEED THEM; BUT TO MUCH OF BRAIN WORK AND DIPLOMACY TO FIND SOME ONE IN DREAM OF LOOKING SOMEON$E SPACIAL BECOME LIFE LONG FULL TIME JOBE OR HUNT; I WISHED IT WAS EASY AS LIFE TOO SHORT; AND LIFE IS GOING VERY FAST;; AS YOU MENSIONED ,THAT STRUCK MY HEART; I LOVE TO HAVE CRUMBS OF YOUR LOVE; IT WILL MEAN SO MUCH TO ME; TO REVIVE MY ENERGIES AND REASON TO LOVE AND TO SERVE SOME ONE SPACIAL: WHO NEEDS ME AND WHO I NEED;; ANYHOW SO NICE TO READ THE ABOVE TITLE AND YOUR STORY.