I Wish This Feeling Didn't Exist

My story begins in 2008, May 19th to be exact, I got an email from a girl that had seen my email address on a website and wanted to be friends, we continued talking and in the following July of 2009 we begun a long distance relationship, It went like any other I suppose, longing for the day we could be together and having stupid little arguments along the way, she made me feel happy, when the world was getting me down and I talked to her my troubles were gone, I finished school in June 2010 and never saw the friends I had after then. So by the end of 2010 all I had was a girlfriend who was thousands of miles away. I used to get down a lot, I felt horrible, I felt like a failure, I didn't know what to do with my life, I couldn't go to college for personal reasons and I have yet to find a job. In June of 2012 she decided she didn't want me anymore and the only remaining person I had was gone. I feel worse now than I ever have, there's nights where all I can do is sit and cry and just wish someone was there for me, the fact is I need someone in my life, I'm lost without someone to make me feel loved, I feel like a failure and that I'll never amount to anything. I hate this feeling, and I have no one to talk to about it. Everyday I put on this mask of happiness to make it look like I'm normal, what i want is a very simple thing, I never asked for anything complex, All I want is love, and acceptance, I can't see myself every having someone cos I'm like this, I'm in such a deep well of despair and I can't see any light. I just need someone to be there for me, and to know someone cares, cos I don't feel like anyone does, no one will probably read this and I don't expect anything from it, I don't even know why I bothered really, I don't actually have any hope in anything anymore, It feels like if something in life comes along it's just going to be gone from me and I'll be feeling like this.