Just Realised

I think I have just realised that I need to feel needed.  My mum has always for years been so needy and as such has alsways told me and my brother and sister how much she loves us - ALL the time to the extent that it frustrates me so much.  She worries like crazy and I am not even able to cough before she starts worrying and thinking i have the worst illness you can think of.  Her love for us is just stiffling - I still feel unable to be free and myself (even tough I am the most rebellious) when around her.  And yet I think i may be turning into her.  I seem to want people to need me or want me.  Maybe this seemingly too strong affection for her kids and my adamant rejection of it has turned it into something I crave.  I really do not want to be like her with it.  I wouldlike to think I am needed, but please dont let it rule my life. 

kingofnothing kingofnothing
26-30, M
3 Responses Feb 21, 2010

The more energy I used to avoid being my mom the more I realized I was my mom. When I was able to let that fear go and accept her for who she is and realize and accept myself the better my life started to improve.

Yes, I think so.... too much love stopping me from giving it back in case I am like her too. You need to let someone free to get them back. I think I hold on to people too much, so they run off. Does that make sense?..

Quite interesting, too much love? :O