I Am Going Through A Process Of Forgiving....

my mother for molesting me from infancy through teenage years... she is still a sexual predator. I have to dress like a nun to be around her. Which I hate, being around her that is. She has borderline personality disorder and the way life is right now, is I am taking money from her for support. (long and complicated story) No, I dont want to be in that situation. But I am working on forgiving her for all her hatred. It is going to be no easy task, but God is here to help. I wish i was one of those people who could just run away from their abuser.. God will help me in every way to get to the place I need to be... I am waiting for my husband to come home and I am getting financial support from my mother (the abuser) .. as much as it looks like a mess, I know God has this under control, I just have to follow Him. I feel that she deserves nothing from me, i feel that forgiving her will give her something from me... but I have to remember that forgiving will give me freedom... if she gets something good out of it then great for her.... i want to help myself. thanks for reading. Peace and love to you all
mama12345678 mama12345678
51-55, F
1 Response Jan 5, 2013

mama can you forgive yourself? No, you were not to blame, but often victims of abuse keep returning to that "what if I had x y z".. This was NOT your fault. By the way, you don't HAVE to forgive right away. You can choose to just sit with it. with the emotions, until you've processed them your own way and then you will be ready to let go of it. To err is human, to forgive Divine, so pray that GOD forgive her, whilst you try to just let her go.. just another thought..

thank you for your support and gentle care.. i am open to all the thoughts people here at EP have.. they help tremendously.. yes I agree, I am blameless in all of what she did to me. completely blameless :) love and peace to you