Sex Therapy (pt. 2)

I met with my sex therapist last Thursday, and again on Monday. Thursday, she had a male doctor in with her (and me). She is still letting me be nude through our sessions, but has told me that I will eventually have to be clothed during our sessions.

She has been asking more productive questions, lately. She has asked if I like watching pornagraphy. I said yes. She asked if I enjoy seeing other men's penises while watchng ****. I said it does nto bother me. But I can imagine myself in their place, having sex and getting ********, etc. She asked if I compare my penis size to other men. I said not really. She asked if I knew why I like being naked all the time, and why I am so uncomfortable when I am wearing clothes. I said I didnt know why...Thats why I am seeing her. She asked if I get excited and turn myself on when I see myself naked in the mirror. I said I do get hornier and more hard when I see myself naked. She asked if ************ is a part of my normal day. I said yes. I told her that I prefer real sex, but I HAVE to ********** in between sex. Then she asked if I was aware everytime I **********. I thought that was weird. I said 'of course'. But maybe Im not. She has a camera to record all her sessions (with all her patients) in the upper corner. I was aware of it, and even signed papers that gave her permission to record our therapy sessions. She played a segment back from my therapy session on Thursday. I was laying on a towel in a chair while we were talking. She had asked me a question about one of my ex girlfriends. As I was answering, I started holding my ****. Then started rubbing it slowly. I was completely unaware. I never cummed, or went into full-blown ************, but I was stroking my ****, and did not know it. I also noticed that right before I started rubbing my ****, I had touched my nipples. She asked if I did that often. I said sometimes. But that my nipples are EXTREMELY over-sensative. When I am wearing a shirt, if I move just right, and the fabric slides across my nipples, I get turned on (horney, hardon, etc). Then, when I am naked, and I feel natural air, or a breeze blow across my nipples, I get horney, too. So, I can't win. My nipples are sooooooo sensative. She has determined that that might be PART of my sexual obsession.

As we were watching the video from our last session the second time, my **** was getting hard. I was rubbing my own nipples and touching my ****, not intentionally. She brought it to my attention. I stopped in embarrassment. I asked her what was wrong with me. She asked if I had ever tried to "protect" my nipples, since they are so sensative. I said I never really thought about it...and asked how. She said I could try to put band aids over them, so my shirt and/or air could not trigger sexual urges. I could also put gauze over them. I said I would try that when I got home that afternoon. By this time in our session, I was so horney and hard. I asked if we could take a quick break so I could use the restroom for a minute. She asked if I was going to **********. I said yes. So I went in, jerked off, and returned to the room. (The restroom is a private restroom, accessible only through her therapy room, so I did not have to walk down the hallway).

After I returned, we talked for a while longer. When our session was over, I told her that I am thinking about quitting my job so I can stay home naked all day. I cant control my sexual needs. She asked me not to, and to be patient, and promised we will get to the bottom of the problem.

I called my favorite ex-girlfriend and told her that I have been going to a sex therapist for the last week. She said 'good' and that I needed to. She came over to my apartment (unannounced) this morning. Her only purpose was to **** me. She said she was up at 3am, ******* her fiancee, but she has been thinking about me since I told her I was going to sex therapy. She knoecked on the door. I opened it. She came in this morning, and said that she missed me. We kissed for a few minutes. She took off her clothes quickly and ****** for about an hour an a half. Several times in the kitchen, my bed, and a few more times in the shower. She is short (5'2") with blond hair and blue eyes. She is my favorite ex-girlfriend. I have never gotten over her. I am sooo glad she came by this morning. She said that she ha dbroken up with me because all I did was ****, and ***. She said I was ******* her so much, that it hurt her *****. Thats why she gave me so many ********...To give her ***** a rest.

I go back to sex therapy tomorrow morning. She said she wanted to come with me, so she could talk to the therapist about me. I said that would be great. I appreciate her support. You have no idea how bad this is...I am in such hell. Being addicted to sex sucks.
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Dec 12, 2012