Similar Experience

My ex-husband is an alcoholic. We were married for 6 years and had one child. The alcoholism wasn't obvious at first, at least not to me, but got progressively worse. I begged him to get help which he refused insisting he could quit on his own. Of course that never happened. I stuck by him, trying to cure him, until I realized he had to WANT to quit first. He never did. When I had done everything I knew, including going to meetings myself and warning many times that I would leave & take our son, I knew the only thing left was to leave. I lost all the love I had for him & I had to take care of my son and provide the best I could for him by myself. That was much better than staying with an alcoholic. My son was 4 when we divorced. He is now a well rounded 14 year old. Last year I married the love of my life who is also a wonderful stepfather and gets along great with my son. The past 10 years have not  been easy but they would have been much worse had I stayed. My ex is now a recovering alcoholic although he just fell off the wagon in 11/05 but is recovering again. I still dislike him a great deal but don't put him down to our son as they now have a basic relationship.
fairylover fairylover
36-40, F
2 Responses Jan 4, 2007

I am a recovering alcoholic that commends you. You took a stand for yourself and your son. That is what was needed. Although I can say it is not easy to be in my shoes my sobriety and the welfare of those who are close to me come first. I got help first of all because I had to do it for me. Then I continue on because I want to be someone that my children can see that my love for them makes me continue my sobriety. Every time I want to drink again I remember the hurt I caused and will never put myself or my children thru that again. Congratulations on finding love!

You are being the bigger person by not putting down your Ex, even when he seems like he doesn't always deserve the courtesy of you holding your tongue.