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I Need to Rant

Cork That Arse Please

By: NotLarryBubkiss
Written on November 13th, 2012
Age: 36-40 , Male
249 people have read this story

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56 responses
  • BadassQuiat

    She could have at least warned you with a toot.

    Nov 16, 2012
    2 likes
    • SpiceZ

      Yes...we need to make that a law :D

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
    • BadassQuiat

      We really do.

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
    • SpiceZ

      :)..hehe

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
    • BadassQuiat

      yay! :D

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
    1 More Reply
  • SpiceZ

    LOL..entertaining, to bad it was true though ;)

    Nov 16, 2012
    1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      Its funny now. People need to warn you before they do that. I had my mouth open and everything

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
    • SpiceZ

      OMG..you poor thing...should I contact the hospital? Or will you manage to recover on your own ;)

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      Its the start of the zombpocolypse

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
  • OdiumIncantatum

    LMMFAOOOOO

    Nov 15, 2012
    1 like
  • MadamElle

    LOL! I can not contain my laughter. Thanks for this!

    Nov 14, 2012
    1 like
  • Kittychanel

    What a foul woman!

    Nov 14, 2012
    1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      Hi Kitty! She put the ooooo in poo. I can still smell it. *sigh*

      Nov 14, 2012
      1 like
    • Kittychanel

      I wonder if she did it at you? Nah,she's just gross. If I did that I would walk very quickly out of there.

      Nov 14, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      She scurried like a cockroach under the quick flick of the kitchen lights

      Nov 14, 2012
      1 like
    • Kittychanel

      Ah OK

      Nov 14, 2012
      1 like
    • DenteAvvelenato

      imagines a cockroach in plaid and denim scurrying about the walgreen's!!!

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      There are motherfukkin coach roaches in this motherfukking Wallgreens

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
    • Kittychanel

      Taco truck? Thats what they call them..roach coach rather lol

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
    • DenteAvvelenato

      why is larry shopping at a walgreens that has cockroaches????

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
    5 More Replies
  • hadyourchance

    Not very lady like. Did you say something? I don't think I would've been able to keep my mouth shut about that.

    Nov 13, 2012
    1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      She farted and then fled. Kind of a hit and run...

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • hadyourchance

      Lol. I'm laughing. I don't even know how to reply to this. She's nasty.

      Nov 14, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      "hind" site is 50/50

      Nov 14, 2012
      1 like
  • DenteAvvelenato
    Nov 13, 2012
    1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      Not terribly old in normal years. I would say 45-50 range which in Midwest terms means she looked 68.

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • DenteAvvelenato

      wut???? LMFAO.... is this some government conspiracy, is HAARP doing this? Do you not have binders to keep your women in ?

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      Yep. Bought my binders at Wallgreen's......well they are more like Peachie Folders

      Nov 16, 2012
      1 like
  • CopperCoil

    Sorry larry.. but I forgot my glasses at home and couldn't read the machine! As for the fart.. well you had that coming from what you did in 8th grade to your history teacher. Sincerely, God.

    Nov 13, 2012
    2 likes
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      It's what she did to me! I was young and impressionable and she took advantage of that by turning me into a man, and as for your cross dressing sensibilities you don't pull off Midwestern obesity in plaid very well, however I will say blue is your color from your jean jacket to your royal navy socks. Well done. Keep it up and we can call you CrapperCoil. pew!

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • DenteAvvelenato

      I like that coppy is now signing his posts as God. This is delightful to me in so many ways!!

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      I hope God doesn't want me to stop touching myself. I'm going to hell......

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • hylierandom

      Coppy is my shepherd; I shall not want...

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • DenteAvvelenato

      is this why we call the seats in the house of Cop "church pews"????

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • CopperCoil

      Pew is right!

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    3 More Replies
  • affinityterra

    This is one of those things that you get pissed off about then laugh about later. I once waited in the like at Wal-Mart for an hour. Once it was finely my turn, the manager came over and said that the register was closing and pointed to another long *** line for me to wait in.

    Nov 13, 2012
    1 like
  • goliathtree

    I once laughed maniacally as I stepped off a very crowded elevator that I had just farted in....it didn't stink though.

    Nov 13, 2012
    3 likes
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      Were you at Wallgreen's today per chance?

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • goliathtree

      no...I told you my farts don't stink.

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      Red herring?

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • goliathtree

      .popcorn

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      You put the p in opcorn :)

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • EdieQuinnz

      .lmao

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • goliathtree

      *farts at EP code writers*

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      If you are going to get their attention better eat something a bit more substantial

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    5 More Replies
  • EdieQuinnz

    ewwww lmao

    Nov 13, 2012
    1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      So wrong, I know......I will never be the same

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • EdieQuinnz

      . poor Larry =(

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      It was like when Geraldo opened up Al Capones Vault. Nothing but bad air came out.....of the vault too

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • EdieQuinnz

      .did she look back at you to see your face? did the cashier smell it too?!

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      I think the cashier thought it was the special needs person she was training. The special needs person (nice kid) was just trying to pronounce my last name as he did with all his customers and the lady just strolled out as if she won the lottery. She was the only "big" winner today ;[

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • EdieQuinnz

      .she is sitting at home laughing at you

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • NotLarryBubkiss

      *bows head in shame

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    • EdieQuinnz

      *giggles*

      Nov 13, 2012
      1 like
    5 More Replies