Here I Am Again

I am starting again thinking to much on the past I guess went on a trip  up north of course had to go by my sisters hose that she died in why I don't know there is so much sadness up there my dad is old he lives that every day her death, at 86 he might come out of it a bit but I think when your kid dies you are just different in life. I will tell you in 1985  my mom died of cancer after a long fight never do i talk about it till know, same year with in months 6 more people died next year my brotherinlaw died at 26 my sister at 35 dear friend  at 30 old friend hit by a car 28, then about 4 young people a few years later 18 years old  butchie gone from to much booze one night . my aunt cancer again my last aunt is living on my moms side  the rest are gone. this is enough to depress anyone I think just to much death for me. Then a kid on drugs really did me in  I got so worn out  had a breakdown lost it went in hospital and have been fighting ever since to keep out of the hospital. I was a weak person I think just I could stop dwelling and worrying god no wonder sadness follows me. I have always been out of place in this world don't know why but I am I try to fit in  but just don't seem to SO I'm on here for some reason this is the first place i can write about stuff , My name grannyGumps guess is a strange name to have well thats it i keep on trying not to be sad but some times I just don't win
GrannyGumps GrannyGumps
51-55, F
2 Responses Jun 27, 2007

I agree you've been through a lot try to find some happiness you deserve it :-)

i'm sorry. <br />
<br />
i hope you enjoy some happiness in your life very soon. you deserve happiness.