I am completely breaking down im 19 years old i have a six month old son with a man who i had to leave because he couldn't grow up and he couldn't stop putting his hands on me even though i left him i miss him which makes me feel stupid i mean hes the father of my childhe said we would always be together but wen wr broke up he never looked back now i just started school my mom has my sin in another state i miss him terribly i miss having my own little family im doing this so my son could have a good life but i feel like the walls are closing in idk what to do !!
anonymousmother anonymousmother
22-25, F
3 Responses Jan 28, 2013

It's hard to know how sincere people are when they tell us that they love us and will always be there for us. Most of the time, they really mean it, or at least feel that way at the time. But time and people change, sometimes in ways we don't want them to, and sometimes not enough (like him not growing up.) The thing you need to realize, is that what he did or didn't do, is not a reflection on you. It doesn't mean anything other than he was afraid of growing up right now. Just like you're breaking down, it's because you're scared and lonely, and it's totally fine to feel that sucks, but it's normal. The best thing I could hope to suggest would be to keep your relationship with your mom and your son as strong as you can. Your mom obviously loves you, and your son definitely loves you. Remember that, and use it to help mentally hug yourself through your day. Your goal should be to become the best person you can, for yourself, and for your son. *hugs*

You are better off without your ex, from the sound of it. You should never stay with somebody who abuses you. I am sorry to hear you are away from your baby, but stay strong and stabilize yourself, for your sake and your son's sake. Good luck.

Hi! First, I understand what you're describing -- it sounds like a really tough situation and I'm not surprised it's getting too much. Second -- I think you did the right thing by posting something here! Doing that, you have more strength than you give yourself credit for.

I definitely don't think you should feel stupid or blame yourself for how things are, or for missing the guy you were with before. That's totally natural, especially if you're also separated from your son, your mom and your dream of a little family.

Some things that you set me wondering about: How long since you left him? And how often do you see your son? Is there a long-term plan, maybe after you finish school, what then?

Stick with it and post back, or if you don't feel comfortable talking about it here, drop me or another commenter a message. Either way, you'll find loads of supportive people here, I'm sure.