Snowy Says Stay Out Of Mine :)

I have wanted to post in this group for quite while now and decided to hold off for one reason or another while I did a lot of soul searching on my own, the results of which are this post.

I learned very long ago that friends and family can be toxic to any relationship. Although this isn't true of all, there are some who manage to wreak havoc without much effort.

Would you want anyone else to interfere in your relationship should be the first question a person asks before stepping in. This question cannot and should not be followed up with, if I was in an unhealthy relationship, because your friends might think that you are, but you might think that you are not. Therefore, again I state that you must first ask yourself, "Would I want anyone else to interfere in my relationship?" If the answer is no, then by your very own standards the answer to the question of whether or not you should interfere in any one of your friends’ relationships, unhealthy or not according to your viewpoint, is a plain and simple “no”.

Relationships are interesting because they can be the absolute most personal thing in anyone's life. They cause people to make huge moves or stay put, to pick up new or lose old friends. In recent news we have even heard of people killing themselves or others over their relationships or lack of them. Yes, relationships are at the center of many peoples’ universes and they are a large part of the growth process for a huge percentage of the population.

Whether you realize it or not, you already have a lot on your plate in attempting to live the best life that you can lead, and if you are in a relationship, in maintaining that relationship and preventing it from becoming an unhealthy one. Your focus on your friend's relationship may in fact be an indication that you are attempting to draw your attentions to someone else's situation in order to avoid facing the facts of your very own unhealthy relationship.
Sometimes there actually can be a problem that the other friends are creating in your life. You must understand that a partner you are in love with expects to be first in your life as an overall understanding. Whatever the case may be though, each person must travel their own path. Each individual must walk through their own journey. We can offer assistance to others who may be in need, but interference should never be our place.

A lot about me and my personal relationships have been exposed on EP. Some of this is my own fault for trusting so readily and ignoring signs along the way and some of it was at the hands of others attempting to make me feel as if I an unworthy, dishonest, etc. Anyone of my ‘true’ friends knows all about my personal life; I don’t make it a secret and I never have to the people that love and care about me. These are the people that have supported me throughout many things. So in closing to all of the people on EP that ‘still’ continue to talk about it please know you do not need to continue. I am me, like it or not, I do not or have I ever pretended to be something I am not. I do not need anyone involving themselves in my personal life any longer.

If you continue to do this I will report you, flag you, and block you; I will do whatever I need to make sure it stops. It really has become ridiculous at this point. I don’t care anymore what you or your ‘friends’ have to say. It is well past time that you concern yourself with your own life and start living your own and leave me and my relationships alone.
snowbunny1002 snowbunny1002
46-50, F
32 Responses Aug 12, 2010

SWagner1- Thanks so much :). Yes there are times people in your life are nothing but toxic to the very core. The best thing is to rid your life of that negativity and destruction :)

I'm sorry that you were hurt by someone close to you! but people need to understand you have a right to your personal space.Everyone's ego makes them think that they need to tell you how to live your life. It sucks! I am glad that you decided to stand your ground and tell then to **** off before It caused you mager problems! good luck

Iza- Thanks for keeping it real. <br />
However, I have had the crossover where others here on EP did involve themselves in my personal life and knew nothing about me personally or the situation. My decision was to remove them from my circle etc because it was negative and it was affecting me personally. <br />
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You are right in the sense it is only EP...

Marcus- thanks for those words. I know there is a place within my soul that is truly peaceful. A place where I am surrounded by love and support. <br />
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For the stuff that happens here on EP, well it is just that EP, What happens in real life is what matters. The interference in this case bled over to real life and I will not allow that to EVER happen again. <br />
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Snowy~

It doesn't take much for the interference to start. It may seem innocuous or "truth-oriented" to the person writing the stories but in the end, all it invariably causes is drama.<br />
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One day, I know you will find peace, no matter what anyone else says. <br />
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Sincerely,<br />
<br />
-marcus

enjoythebeach- Thanks very much my friend. I think it is something important especially here on EP where one can be drug into alot of BS and drama. Who really needs that ya know? <br />
We all have our own lives to live ...

Snowy~ thank you for bringing this to the forefront. Others need not be concerned with how. We lead our lives and relationships. That kind of meddlesome intrusion is not appreciated. Excellent post!

AllAboutLaffs- Thanks very much for your kind words. And I agree unless you ask for feedback then people should stay out of other's personal matters. :)

Thanks Iza. I can relate very well to what you are saying. It took me awhile to put my thoughts into words. As you know I have struggled with a lot of interference and it simply does not matter to me any longer. I am who I am and I do make my own decisions. People claim they want to 'help' but really if it is not solicted then why send or say things to someone that only hurts in their healing process. As you say too much BULL !!

Sensualintelligence-I'm not sure why you cannot either but your comment did come through :) . Thanks so much !! :)

I am not sure why I cannot comment on your story Snowbunny but I agree with your post. You may never see this comment if the EP Gods of Black Holes have anything to do with it.

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Kitten- I know you've been there too and I agree it would be so much better if we could share more but unfortunately it only takes 1 bad apple...lol <br />
I'm with you..NEVER again for me. It only takes one time to get BURNED for me to learn my lesson. <br />
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XOXOX

Vignette- I totally agree. If you ask your friends/family for advice or their opinion that is a different story. Anytime you do this you have to be receptive to feedback. <br />
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This story has been a long time coming. Thanks so much for your comments :)

I've blocked who I have needed too but I did encounter a little something today !

On FB too y'all seriously? I had that one problem on FB and that is all. I mean I know certain persons are not nice there and try but it is it a general problem or is it just the one person. BTW if you report it on FB they do an "official investigation" and fix feeds so that person cannot get to your profile while it is being investigated.

That is a fact Snowy!!!!! I love my man and I don't care who knows I love him but it is no one's business what we do offsite or onsite for that matter. A very smart man (and a mutual friend of ours) once told me that he is "private for a purpose." I have been friends with this man for years and he gave me that advice. In the past I was more open about my life with my SO's but with my military guy it is so much different. You have experienced us interacting firsthand so you know what we feel for one another but I will not invite the general population of EP into that part of my life ever again. Will you, Silver, Bassy, and Bluebie spend time with us in real life? Of course you will but I won't post pictures or stories about such any longer because there are those that try to get their nose in places they should not be putting them.

That is a fact Snowy!!!!! I love my man and I don't care who knows I love him but it is no one's business what we do offsite or onsite for that matter. A very smart man (and a mutual friend of ours) once told me that he is "private for a purpose." I have been friends with this man for years and he gave me that advice. In the past I was more open about my life with my SO's but with my military guy it is so much different. You have experienced us interacting firsthand so you know what we feel for one another but I will not invite the general population of EP into that part of my life ever again. Will you, Silver, Bassy, and Bluebie spend time with us in real life? Of course you will but I won't post pictures or stories about such any longer because there are those that try to get their nose in places they should not be putting them.

BonnieBelle- It's the same way here as well. Whenever you reveal part of yourself you run the risk of having those things and more thrown back up at you. It really is a shame. I agree Facebook people on my facebook get nosy too :)

This is one of the reason I am no longer on face book. You are absolutely right. On face book so called friends and family get so nosy.. I hated that.

Anytime doll :)

Hey Groovy~ Thanks for that!! I needed a laugh~

Yea....the groups called: Have you ever stuck your foot, up a bunny's butt? lol. Good job on the post Snowy!

I think there is another group for that isn't there FG? LOL...thanks for doing it when it needed to be done :)

Heck, you haven't mentioned the times I gently stuck my foot up your butt! LOL

Aww Bassy that's so sweet!! Thanks :)))

:)<br />
Standing by your side was a no brainer my friend :)

I know and I thank god I have ones that have stood by my side through the good times and not so good times :)

You are welcome Snowy bun buns.... it is just what friends do. ((hugs))

BF-- Thanks it was an important message for me to get out here :) <br />
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Bassy- Thanks for always accepting me for me :) <br />
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ABL- I know you understand :)))<br />
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FG- Thanks so much my friend...for everything!

I am glad you are "you"<br />
<br />
:)

Well said Snowy.