All I Need From You Is An Opinion

A friend of mine, whom I met through an online support group for caregivers of cancer patients, is now struggling, along with her husband, through his final battle with disease. His kidneys are failing, and it is a matter of weeks, if not days, until he passes on.

In the course of conversation, she mentioned that she needed to prepare his obituary and just couldn't face the task - so I offered to help.

As I was drafting the obituary and reading some tributes from friends and studying the personal information my friend had sent me, I was moved to write the following poem.

I am thinking about sending it to her along with the obituary information, whether just as something she reads and discards, or as part of the service or the obituary, that's all up to her. What I want from YOU is an opinion - should I send it, or not? I can never tell if my poetry is drek or not, and this is important enough that I do not want to send her trash.

The Last Testament

When now we look at him

Pale and still

He seems no longer present

A deserted building that no longer echoes

With slamming doors and laughter

Windows shuttered and unlighted

The air empty of

The fragrance of shared feasts

But in the faces and in the marrow

Of those gathered

And those far away

Beneath the tears and trembling mouths

Are the gifts he gave.

When he was strong and well

And when he was weak and failing

The respect and love for others

That rang in every word and deed

That strength that shored him up

When lesser men would crumble

The grit to face the impossible

The grace that urged him

Not to seek comfort in his darkest hours

But to offer comfort.

When the celebration of his life

And the parting from it is complete

We will go away and cry and work

And someday laugh and play again.

But in those night moments and in the light of day

Often one of us will stop and smile and say

This was a man.