I Get Overlooked On A Daily Basis...

I'm 28 yrs old and i've never had a bf.  I'm not a virgin and yes i've been kissed before but i've never had a bf.  I don't care about what race a person is but sadly i live in a place in Alabama where it makes a big difference.  i  grew up in a small very southern and white town.  I moved to the city and i don't have an urban accent and people make fun of me or call me an OREO.  Black guys don't like me because they think i'm trying to sound 'white'  (whatever the hell that means, if it means that they can understand me when i talk and that i use words that are in the English Dictionary, then i'm guilty for having very dedicated teachers in high school.)  Many of my friends don't hang out with me anymore because i am single and they don't want to make me feel bad or make me feel like the 3rd wheel. Today, perfect example, i find out on my FB that they've all went to the movies or had lunch or meeting for dinner without me.  I called to see if i could meet them there and they tell me they've only made reservations for 8 ppl.  Because 9 is such an awkward number and they could all fit in 2 cars. 
My twin sister has always had a bf and she tells me that there is something wrong with me.  She has never had a problem getting a date to the formals in college or on the weekends.  She's probably the least supportive person in my life at the moment. 

I've been rejected many times (4 within the last week) and it's making it that much harder to actually put myself out there.  I am an attractive, well-groomed person with a great sense of humor and an amazing personality.  The thing is, no one wants me.  I'm well traveled, a good listener, educated and talented.  Theses are not self-affirmations and in no way am I trying to make myself feel better.   
I've tried Internet dating, going to church, hanging out at the mall(which at my age is setting me up for jail-bait problems), joining a gym, asking random strangers.  I don't know what else to do.  Some of my best friends are guys but they tell me they could never look at me as more than just a friend. 
I give myself a few more months before i go to therapy for depression.
greenmonkey1983 greenmonkey1983
26-30, F
3 Responses Aug 28, 2011

Hi, I don't know if I actually had a bf in my life, because my relationships have always been really short. I noticed that some guys could have fallen in love with me, but those unfortunately never interested me. On the other hand, I seem to be always attracted to princes who turn into frogs very quickly. I have this problem of finding a bf too.. maybe I am too picky (I fall in love with guys that I admire for their apparent intelligence and a bit of looks), and I am aware that I have a problem of lack of self-confidence. I think being too open and honest in a relationship never helps, as they seem to like some mystery and the idea that there is still something to get from you. I know I did not help much, but good luck!

i dress professionally when i'm at work and coservative but attractive when i'm not at work. I do sit back and let them approcah me. And where i'm at they say i'm talking 'White-folk talk' Thanks for the advice :)

I understand what you mean but what if you're just going for the wrong person. And to be honest with you give a guy something to want about you, never approach a guy let him approach you. Make him want you, how do you dress? And we don't call it talking white here we say talking proper.