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I Have Never Had a Boyfriend...

I am almost 18 years old, and unfortunately I have never had a boyfriend.  I used to be really confident in my appearance wheen I was younger, but growing up, my self-confidence began to diminish. I have always struggled with feeling unattractive my shyness. People tell me that I am attractive, and in high school a couple of guys wouuld flirt with me, but even that never really fully boosted my confidence. When I'm around guys (patricularly ones that I am attracted to) I get really nervous and my mind goes blank with conversation. I feel like when I do talk to guys they mostly ignore me or find me uninteresting. I feel really bad, because while most of my friends come to me and talk about their relationships, I sit in silence because I have not gone through the experience. I'm scared that I will not find the confidence or self-assuredeness that I need and that I will be alone forever...
honey07 honey07 16-18, F 13 Responses Mar 31, 2007

Your Response


Consider yourself fortunate. No one needs a bf/gf before 18. You'll just mess with your head.<br />
Once you find the right person, and your hearts connect, you won't be able to stop talking. Don't worry about knowing what to say. If you are right for each other and just open up, it will work. <br />
If every guy you know of you are scared of - you don't want them anyway. <br />
You've got lots of time.

You will find somebody soon, your young. Hold out on men until the right one comes! I'd love to see a picture of you but ur profile restricts me because of my age.<br />
Tell m about yourself and I would love to help you :-)

Just take your time.

You should go find a nice quiet place, where you can be at peace with yourself, and **********. Great therapy.

I feel the exact same way as you ive never had a boyfriend either and im extremely shy around people i dont know. I hate being this way but its like i cant change it even though ive tried.

18 YOD is rather okay if you don't have a boyfriend, wait when you are 33 YOD and it'll be even more weirder. I talk from experience here; I never met a guy who was interested in me. If there were, it was because I could hook them up with my beautiful girlfriends!!!!!! I've always been invisible in the dating business, but for help everyone knows where I am!

You're not alone. I'm 18 now and I've never had a boyfriend. Of course, there was some flirt and childish crush but not the real thing. I'm starting to believe that I'm unattractive and hopeless. But I think it's better to be like that than be that girl who goes with everyone.Of course it's sad..

flirt them back, that would make you feel better.. you feel nervouse because you donĀ“t know what to do next, so you only need to nkow that you are not the only one and that there are more people feeling the same as you.. ^^

I also never had boyfriend in high school; I was known as weird looking student and quiet. I did have a crush on a guy in high school but I didn't talk because I was too shy; and he never talked to me either but I think he liked me for a little while. I'm like you; when it comes to hot guys; my brain goes blank and freezes; I have to force my words out. I think some girls weather in high school or not; get tongue-tied around hot guys. I did meet a guy 7 years ago and he was hot, I couldn't talk to him to much; all I could say is one or two words or 4 or 5 words phrases. he's only one in my life that made me go wow twice. he did liked me but nothing happened. my first boyfriend was when I was 22 years old. so you're still young and you will meet a mature, decend nice guy in the future.

alskdfj. i can relate to you so much. i've had the stupid little boyfriend thing that lasted about 3 days in 7th grade and that was about it. i used to have alot of friends that were in the same position and didnt feel so alone but in what seemed like overnight they all have gotten boyfriends, even the ones that i never expected to have boyfrineds before me (i know that sounds mean, but idk.) even my best friend has moved on into the world of guys and i just feel like some freak whose going to like end up alone and someday i'll be like 40 years old and never been kissed. and it doesnt really help when everyone in my family has bad luck with men and are all divorced and alone, an d it feels like im cursed. but the thing that does keep me hopeful is seeing people who are really in love and i believe that you and maybe even me could find that. and the truth is, that most boyfriends that people have in their teens are just filled with drama and no real commitment anyways and usually dont last long. i supose that i rather wait longer to have a boyfriend and have one that is really looking for someone to spend the rest of their life with you instead of the stupid little highschool/college flings.<br />
idk. i think im rambling. <br />
im not even sure what im trying to say.<br />
but i know how u feel.

me, too. to top it off, someone in my house keeps asking me "are you gay?" every time they ask "you don't have a boyfriend, yet?".

Thanks for the encouragement Cmost. I'll try to hang in there...

I believe you will find someone special. When I was in highschool I was painfully shy. Especially around guys I found attractive. I felt like an idiot when I got around a guy I liked because I drew a blank. I never knew what to say. Eventually I have gotten over that as I have gotten older. I am still a little shy just not as severe. You are still young and I am sure you will meet someone nice. Hang in there!