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I Never Loved My Husband

Never Loved Him

By: the3Ls
Written on December 19th, 2008

I come from a Pakistani, Muslim family. I was born and raised in the US. I am 27 years old, with 2 kids. I was forced in a marriage at the age of 17. Everyone that would hear this story would say, "you can't be forced in America". Well my parents always said, "parents are always the well wishers, and they know best." I tried to convince them not to arrange this marriage, but it didn't work.

So from 2000 to 2005 I tried and tried to love him. Whenever he touched me I felt like it was so forced and nasty. He's a very caring man-he provided and helped me raise our kids, but I just never felt the love. I recently told my dad about the situation and he said "divorce is not the answer, he is a very caring, loving man and you have to get used to it." 

I just don't know where to go on with life. I'm still in college and can't even support myself. ANd the thought of my action of divorce makes me feel that I'll lead a negative domino effect in many people's lives. I spoke to my husband about me not loving him, but he always says "you have to make sacrifices and try" WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN??

By: the3Ls
Age: 26-30
1,332 people have read this story

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2 responses
  • the3Ls
    the3Ls

    Hi Loop,



    I understand that living the 'unhappy' life is not the way to go. Well part of my happiness are my kids. I stop myself and think I'll be doing something selfish if I leave their father. Did you remarry? Do you have any kids from your previous marriage? If so, how did the kids take it?

    Dec 29, 2008
    1 like
  • loopnscc
    loopnscc

    Well I say you have to come up with a plan and working on the plan. Being in college is a good start to getting a well paying job to support yourself. You also need to find yourself and find the things that make you happy so in the end you are a happy person once you leave. Remember you only have one life and going through it unhappy is not the way to go. I lived in a marriage for a long time, I finally realized I never truely loved my wife, not the way two people should. I wasn't forced into it, at the time I thought I was making the correct choice, but it didn't turn out the way I expected or planned. I eventually took action and am now a much happier person.

    Dec 19, 2008
    2 likes