MOTHERS Who Don't Get It

I never seem to be able to get what I need from my mother.  i think it has to do with when my little sister was born, the whole jealousy thing.  She was always the one the got all the attention.  Here I am close to 60 yrs. and still struggle with this.  I never feel like I mean anything to her.  I have been disconnected from her before and if it wasn't for me seeking to see her again I'm not sure I would have ever seen her.  She has done some things that where really hurtful to me and I have decided to disconnect again.  I'm just tired of feeling I'm not important to her.  She would never call me to see what is wrong.  It's really hard dealing with this.  I feel this is the reason I don't like myself.  My daughter wants me to put an ad on the internet to met people but I keep telling her how can I expect people to like me when I don't like myself?  Even at work I feel like I am unimportant.
cuddle cuddle
56-60, F
Jul 21, 2007