Never the Kick Off Team, Always the Receiver

It never feels natural for me to begin conversations with people, especially strangers.  If there is a gene that is closely linked to the ability to strike up conversations, I clearly don't have it.  Small talk to me is boring and a waste of time.  Whenever I do have start a conversation, I feel like I spend most of the time trying not to put my foot in my mouth.  It's so much better to have someone give you conversation prompt.  If someone else choose the topic, I can usually get rolling pretty good but there is too much pressure to start them myself.  Any suggestions???

reachin4goals reachin4goals
31-35, F
2 Responses Aug 12, 2007

That's an interesting viewpoint, Tardy. I'm exactly like you reachin. I always feel extremely awkward starting conversations, and if I have to start a conversation, I don't even know what to talk about.

Maybe you're missing the point of small talk? I used to think it was a waste of time, but then I realised that the words themselves are quite irrelevant. Instead, I think small talk is about using nonverbal cues to scope someone out, and try to find a point of connection, a place where the conversation can be natural and at ease. Once in that zone there is much less risk of foot-in-mouth; it's a place were starting a fight or hurting someone's feelings is much less likely. Small talk is the scouting party! :D