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Jesus Please Take Me To Heaven!

I have been through alot I mean alot of abuse of all kinds, my mother allowed and even watched. she's hated me since the day I was born. I should be the girl called " It" just like the book of the boy called " It " I hate myself I can't even stand to be inside my own body. I have lost two kids to dead and have one seven year old I can barely see. I have had lost of family and friends to suicide. My boyfriend shot himself in front of me almost two years ago and it's my fault . I
Have tried to end my life
a few times by shooting myself and drinking lots of toxic chemicals and still haven't succeeded. IM dead inside
DEAD81 DEAD81 31-35 1 Response Jan 29, 2013

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Your life, my friend is worth so much more than what you've been through! I know it doesn't seem like you have anything to offer, but I can assure you, you do! When it's your time to leave this earth, it will happen, but until that day....live your life to the fullest. I know it's hard to fathom forgiveness, but in order to live a full life without resentment and regrets, you must forgive those who have hurt you in the past. You are not excusing their hurtful actions, but letting go of the baggage. You're not a perfect person either, so forgive yourself as well! It takes a lot of effort to hate and drains who you are. Choose to be better....I'm sure in time, your outlook will change and you will have more reasons to wanting to live than not! If you need to talk, just send me a message.