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Why Did I Do That?

The phone rang yesterday and unfortunately, I answered it. It was the woman that found private duty clients for me over the years. I was a private caregiver for many years and my clients were generally elderly gentleman. I discovered over the last few decades that professionally I get along much better with men, this has been a running theme for me. Even as a child, I felt more comfortable with my Dad and my brothers than with my Mom. Although, I look feminine, I have been accused of having the mind of a man, whatever that means. I wish that I could write with the voice of a man, I generally find that I prefer reading male authors. My own writing is a bit floral for my tastes to be honest. Odd though..... that I cannot stand sports or manly movies, clearly, I am a mixed up mess!

Back to the point of this story.....I haven't worked for two years and I did not plan to work again if I could help it. The woman on the phone gave me a sad story about a gentleman who needs a temporary caregiver while his caregivers are out for a family emergency, (two sisters care for him) I heard myself agreeing to do five twelve hour 7p.m to 7a.m. shifts. Now I am thinking "Why did I do that?"

Here is the thing, I don't believe in Coincidences, the gentleman must really need me, or perhaps I really need to get out of the house for a few nights in order to appreciate my life here more or to balance my time here more effectively or to appreciate my bed more since I will be awake all of those nights. There is a reason for everything in my simple mind.

My clients have added such richness to my life, some of them I was with for years, they taught me about living and about dying, about grace and about purpose. More than anything they taught me to live in the moment and to always put my family first. When you work in private homes, you become very intimate with people very quickly, this too is a rare blessing. My work was always a vocation and not a career. If I had not worked as a caregiver, I could not have cared for my own daughter in her time of greatest need, so, I owe a huge debt to the craft of nurturing and nursing. I am grateful for this one thing perhaps more than any other thing in my life. I do not think that I could have stood by and watched others taking care of my helpless and beautiful daughter.

Epers, you won't be hearing from me from Sat June16th until Thursday June 21st, as all I will be doing is my work at home or sleeping and working this temporary job, I hope this gentleman is a nice fellow! :-) It's amazing how being away from working for two years makes me feel overwhelmed at the thought of doing a simple temporary five night assignment. Don't go anywhere kids! :-)
hillbillycrone hillbillycrone 56-60, F 8 Responses Jun 14, 2012

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btw, I also get along well with men. I like sports and action movies and some of my cousin sisters complain that i don't take much interest in their talks that are mostly about their husbands, MILs and inlaws etc in general about household matters. It's not that i dont have interest in these things, it's just that im not good at discussing these things. I think it's because I spend a lot of time with men during work. Whatever the reason, I am just like that. I don't know why i have so much resemblance with you and another EP friend. Interestingly both of you are far elder than me. o_0

I have just come here and you're already gone I am not playing lol

I'm back..... :-) one night and that was all it took, I'm so done. <br />

Hope that side-assignment give you a lot of fun and enrich your experience and love, and you make a good friend with your client *hugs*

I only made it one night, it's no longer what I want to do. But thank to figure out my calling for THIS time of my life. Hugs!

Aww *hugs* well I'm sure there are plenty other new thing that you may like to try :)

I will miss you Hilly. I believe you are right with what you say though and you have to follow your instincts.<br />
I reckon you will come away even more wise and knowledge about the world if that is even possible. I look forward to your future stories on this experience. xxx

Thanks Jenni, I enjoy being at home too much to be accept anything more than a few days! It will be nice to go back into retirement in a few days and back to EP! I'll miss you too ~very much! xxx

Thank you so much for your kind words. I am nervous about it, one gets out of the swing of working, especially nights. This client lived in a gated community and is now at the nursing center there, so, I won't be alone. It's simply a bedside care position, nothing too complicated with lots of hands on help if I need it. I'll be glad to come back home though and sleep in the bed with Poppa! Can you imagine staying awake when everyone is snoring up and down the hallways, it's interesting keeing ones self entertained if I recall clearly and I think that I do. :-) <br />
I'll be missing you too! xx

i had to go back and re-read this. I just love the part where you say that the most important thing they taught you was to live in the moment and put your family first. The elderly are so precious and we really can learn so much from them.<br />
Another reason i re-read it is because I've been thinking looking into this as a job. There's just one thing that I'm not sure I could deal with. (not being mean, i just don't know if i could stomach one certain thing that often happens with the elderly)

Oh, you get used to that! That's the least of it, having patience with people who get angry and combativewith you when you're being as kind as you can be, that's a challenge. :-)

I won't go anywhere~But i will surely miss you a whole bunch!~<br />
I too, believe that things happen for a reason and also that people come into our lives for a reason. Sometimes, it may take a while for us to figure out what exactly that reason is,....but....most times, we will see it eventually.<br />
I'm so sorry about your daughter..... It breaks my heart to think that such an awesome person has to know such tragedy. I'm sure it helps to write about it?...<br />
I hope this gentleman is a nice fellow too. Don't worry, you will be fine. I think that this nurturing thing is as natural to you as breathing because you are so good at it. Maybe it will be like "riding a bicycle".<br />
I will be thinking of you and will miss you very much!!!!<br />
love anf hugs