Near Death Resurrection

In the past i have seperated from my wife because i got married young and thought that i wasnt really ready for it...Ive always been a person to not want to hurt anyone so i tried battling my feelings inside and trying to not hurt her. It didnt work out so well. I started going downhill and became 'depressed' as the doctor called it. He immediately put me on meds (which i thought was odd with only talking to me once) and i started to take them... They didnt help anything, i shut out family and friends and didnt feel anything at all, not happy, not sad, not worry, just emptiness...

After about two months on them, my wife and i had a blowout at counseling and she told me to go home and get my stuff and get out by theh time she got home..I was on the edge...I was so mad that these pills were not working and just wanted to feel so i could get the right words out..I went home and took 5x what i was supposed to and drank beer. I am NOT suicidal, i just wanted something to happen and change...Needless to mention, i ended up in the ICU for three days and ended up cleaning up my life after that. For anyone that is depressed now and just want to give up....DONT DO IT!! Life will get better, its just a matter of time and takes work!!
jbratnick jbratnick
22-25, M
1 Response Jan 9, 2012

Hi j. Thank you for sharing your story. Your bravery in sharing your very personal and intimate story is inspirational to many and sends a very strong message, worthy of taking notice of: "For anyone that is depressed now and just want to give up....DON'T DO IT." Simple, yet very profound message. And for those that suffer from depression, whether environmental or biochemical, this message is so powerful! I suffer from major depression (the biochemical kind, sadly) and have been down in the depths of darkness and can relate to wanting to end the suffering. But, you're right, and my relationship with Christ helps me to see that no problem is so big that it is deserving of a permanent solution. Problems and feelings are temporary and they too shall pass. <br />
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Two precious young people from my community, within the past 6 months, 21 years of age and younger, have committed suicide by hanging. One precious soul was my daughter's fiance, who ended his life November 14, 2011. My daughter will be having his daughter on July 24 of this year and sadly she will never know her father. The pain, anguish, and immense suffering my daughter has endured is unbearable to witness and although it gets easier for her each day, it will always be ever present as their daughter will grow up without a father, and my daughter will grow older without the love of her life. <br />
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Again, I thank you for sharing your story. Your message can help others if they happen to come across this page. God bless you!