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May 23rd, 2009
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I am fed up with myself. I need my freedom and I need it now! I am 46 years old and feel like I have done so much in my life already, this one BIG thing (not driving) holds me prisoner to my former self. So a couple of weeks ago, I went to the online DMV site and made an appointment to take the written (permit) test. I downloaded a PDF of the manual and a test program (that was great!) and I studied for an hour a day for a four days.
Yesterday, I realized that my appointment was a half hour away and panicked that I would miss it. I kept this whole thing a secret from my husband as I wanted to do this whole thing ON MY OWN. So I had to run---I put on my running shoes and workout wear and ran! YES physically ran, the 1.5 miles to the DMV and just made it. I was hot and sweaty but I figured, its just a written test..who cares?
I get there, stand in my line and pay the fees. My heart starts to beat and I deep breathe to calm myself down. Then the lady sends me over to get my picture taken! (WHAT? Before I take the test?? Holy hell..I am hot sweaty and the like!) But I took the picture, and proceed to the testing area.
Now as I go through the 32 questions, I constantly remind myself to calm down, slow down and breathe. Rushing will not help me. I consistently hear the examiner telling person after person that they failed! At least 6 times in a row.. all licensed drivers who are failing the test! I tried to ignore that.
I took the test and lightly marked the four questions that I was not sure of. Then I went back and rechecked those answers.
I got in the line to check my test, and kept hearing over and over "I am sorry, you failed. You will have to take the test again." It got to my turn, and she said "Very good. 95%. Go to Window 2 to pick up your forms."
What? I did it? Whoo HOOO! I signed and picked up my forms and looked at my permit with pride. I did it. I have a problem with being anxious with testing to the point of avoidance, so this was a big first step for me.
Now on to driving lessons! I post this for those of you who are not only fearful of driving but fearful of TESTING. If I can do this, anyone can.
My license pic will not be the best but it will show how happy I was! 
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  | Posted Jun 17th, 2009 at 11:50AM Good for you! I am in my 20's - and I have had a terrible fear of driving since I was 16 & saw a terrible accident. One man in it was virtually decapitated - his head was hanging by a thread of skin. My bf at the time and I were trapped right next to the collision for over 20min & had to give statements to the Police even though we only saw the actual "crunch" of the accident. 2 couples dead: probably just driving to work (& bickering) like us. I couldn't stand the burden of feeling responsible for the lives of others, so for years hid behind "environmental awareness", which I still try to live up to by the way... Anyway: now I feel free, just like you, and I too have a Licence photo in which I look like the 'cat who just got the cream'! +2 nods   |
 | Posted Jun 17th, 2009 at 6:58PM wow. what a story! That is exactly why I feared driving. In fact, shortly after getting my first license at at 28 I too got into an accident. Never to drive again. You are a brave and inspirational person! |
 | Posted Jul 13th, 2009 at 10:57AM Driving is a relaxation. Very soon you will realise that you have some control of atleast something. |
 | Posted Jul 15th, 2009 at 2:31PM I am sooooooooooooo proud of you. It is fun to drive and you get a sense of independence. Good Luck to you. |
 Feeling blank | Posted Jul 21st, 2009 at 12:31AM Happy for you!!!! Yes, we (i'm 40) need to break those ties that bound us to our ordinary days and just take a leap up, testing our own ability ..... it's great that you decided to take up the challenge by yourself (not involving your husband) so you can see the real value that you actually have inside.... Go on...don't stop there....go out and find out tons of opportunities waiting to be touched by you... |
 | Posted Jul 30th, 2009 at 11:53AM It is a wonderful picture, if I ever feel sad I will come back to look at it. xxx |
 | Posted Nov 5th, 2009 at 7:24AM I think the picture looks great. CONGRATULATIONS!!!! |
 Feeling relaxed | Posted Nov 5th, 2009 at 9:26PM congratulations i am sure your family wiill be proud. excellent pic too! |
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