I Saw a Terrible Accident When I Was 17

It has taken me several years to overcome my Fear (I have a friend who's a practicing Psychologist who calls it an actual "Phobia" - 'cos it affected my life profoundly) of Driving.

When I was 17years old, my Boyfriend (now ex) was giving me a lift to work. We were taking a "short-cut" that a lot of people used to take on account of it being a bit of a backstreet. Anyway - we were approaching a corner when we heard the sound of metal screeching against metal. Within a second we saw that 2 cars had driven straight into each other (one should've given way - apparently the young couple inside had been arguing, just like my B/F & I had been)...

4 people, probably just driving to Work like us - all dead because of a momentary lapse in concentration. I remember that even though we were about 4 cars back from the crash, blood was trickling down around the tyres of our car. One of the guys in the crash had been all but decapitated by the metal in his twisted door-frame. His head was literally hanging by a thread of skin.

I vividly recall being trapped looking at this horrible scene for over 1/2 an hour - Cops questioned us, but because we only heard the accident happen the interview was brief. Seeing the 'Jaws of Life' come along and tear those cars even further apart so that the four bodies could be retrieved was gut-wrenching. Let me put it this way - it was one of those few Road Traffic Accidents which gets mentioned on the news, but no picture is ever shown...

I didn't realize how much it had affected me until I finally got to Work - and when I bumped into a friend from another Department who innocently asked me why I was so late that day I just started bawling & told her about the accident. She was sensible enough to suggest I go to the Workplace Counselor, but I was in enough trouble with my Supervisor to even consider it.

Long story short(er) - until last year I made every excuse under the Sun as to why I shouldn't get my License: Wanting to contribute less to Global Warming, I lived in the City anyway so why shouldn't I rely on Public Transport, etc. etc.

About a year or (so) ago, Health concerns (recovering from Surgery) forced me to move back in with my Mother & Step-Father after several years of living independently. I now live an hour and a half's drive away from the University I attend, and there is virtually no Public Transport here! So, I had to bite the bullet and "Get Over It"!

It was really hard - I hadn't wanted the feeling of being responsible for other people's lives like that. But I have forced myself to work through my anxieties, and that is mainly a good thing - I think!

Pixie87 Pixie87
22-25, F
Jul 18, 2009