Eyes

I could drown in your eyes.
Their oceans of warmth.
They see no fault in me.
They seem to accept me for me.
Your eyes captivate me,
they could be so cold
yet they are so warm.

Rarely do I see them,
not filled with good humor.
You don't take offense,
from my cruel words.

I feel terrible
for trying to put you down,
but I don't deserve that warmth.
I want you to get mad,
shun me,
yell at me,
stop listening to me.

Your warmth confuses me,
sending my heart racing
and my mind goes into turmoil.
your hugs are firm,
encasing me in your arms.
I tense but I want it to last longer,
I want to hug you back.
Have you as a shoulder to cry on.

You can't find out how I feel.
If you do,
my life will spiral into chaos.
I know exactly when I fell for you.
The moment when you mentioned my eyes.
You told me you loved their dark brown color.
that you loved how I saw life.

You don't know though,
that my eyes see much more.
They see pain, hurt, grief,
I see how people react.
How love falls apart.
How friendships crumble
at one word.
How easily trust is broken,
fun ruined.

These eyes of mine,
don't reflect the turmoil.
That swirls inside me,
the dark thoughts and motives.
The light trying to cage the dark,
the darkness recedes.
But its still there,
on a short leash.
I can usually control it,
but sometimes
my grip loosens.
Letting free some darkness,
but the light puts it back.

You don't actually see me,
you see my acting,
my mask.
I feel bad for you,
liking someone like me.
Don't cherish me,
don't like me.

Find a girl who will jump into your arms,
who will be able to drown in your eyes
and embrace your warmth.
cvercimak cvercimak
13-15, F
May 18, 2012