Envy

I have no right to be jealous,
I'm the one who has the boyfriend.
Your the one who is single,
yet for some reason.
My heart clenches,
when I see you not with me.

I feel selfish and sound stupid,
and it's no fair for you.
You like me,
but I'm taken.
You don't act like it hurts you,
but I feel like it does.
You just don't show it.

I want you to,
not just my boyfriend.
My selfishness needs to be put to sleep.
Shoved into a corner of my mind.
I feel a pit in my stomach,
when I think of you.
My mind and my heart ache,
from the complexity of the situation.

I like you,
but I like my boyfriend.
I need to reset them,
reset everything,
start over new.

Your free to do what you want,
I am accepting that.
I'm the one who mustn't burden you,
causing you the same turmoil I feel.
I will spare you that,
yet the punishment is all mine.
But I wear that burden happily as long as you are spared.
cvercimak cvercimak
13-15, F
May 18, 2012