Joyfully Unaccomplished?

Below is something that I wrote a few months ago and posted on a community forum in which I felt safe, understood and embraced. I wrote it in an attempt to reach out, connect and get some perspective but not one person responded. Not a one. Because I had bore so much of my soul, at first I was sad that I did not get the empathetic response my heart so yearned for. But soon, with time, I simply began to understand the whole experience as the learning opportunity it was.

But still, the questions I posed remain outstanding.

I truly believe with all my heart that self love & acceptance are the true gateways to joy and vibrancy. Yet I remain frustrated.

Please read below. I welcome your comments, but am of course understanding if I get no response. Perhaps it is for me to sit alone with this question until clarity reigns free!


Submitted April 11, 2001: I would like to know if anyone has experience in achieving very little and becoming nothing recognized by society as legitimate, yet still maintaining inner joy and peace and continuing to develop an increasingly powerful sense of self worth even while time marches forward and you continue to do nothing? In other words, the more you do nothing, the more power, joy and purpose you have. Anyone? This would be a great feat, right? Because 'doing' and 'becoming' are typically the cornerstones of identity, accomplishment and social status.  So on what basis can one stand tall and firm and feel powerful and valued in society, if one has not done or become anything? 
Somewhere in my heart is a voice that says that “this, my dear, is the greatest of spiritual challenges – to forgo those ego-driven social indulgences that come with identity, family, career and acknowledgments yet still feel right as rain in the world”.  That sounds wise, right?  But it also feels like a cope out.  I can stand tall, firm and powerful if I stay clear of the society of which I was raised to be a part (such as I am doing).  But put me in a room of accomplished should-be peers, and I am challenged.
Does anyone know what I am talking about?

Shandana Shandana
46-50, F
Jun 13, 2011